


The Catalyst

by KatieKomics



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: F/F, Group chat, Implied abuse, Korekiyo doesn't like her back, Language, M/M, Other, Sort Of, Suggestive Themes, Threats, Tsumugi is Korekiyo's sister, Unhealthy Relationships, Violence, but they work on it, danganronpa is a tv show, everybody hates each other, everybody is horrible, implied one-sided Tsumugi and Korekiyo, kaede works at a record store, kirumi works at a creepy maid cafe, kokichis life sucks, oh god where do I even start with this one, pregame au, recovery but only sorta, shuichis parents are rich, tsumugi is an intern for danganronpa
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-13
Updated: 2020-06-06
Packaged: 2021-02-28 05:53:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 20,359
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22698940
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KatieKomics/pseuds/KatieKomics
Summary: When Kaede Akamatsu is invited to join a fandom group chat made by Shuichi Saihara, she decides she has nothing to lose. She stays to watch the chaos as the small knit collection of people she hates start to tear themselves apart.
Relationships: Akamatsu Kaede/Tojo Kirumi, Oma Kokichi/Saihara Shuichi, Shinguji Korekiyo/Shirogane Tsumugi
Comments: 19
Kudos: 112





	1. 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, guys! Something a little different from my other projects. This one is based on a Discord group pregame RP. Chat segments are mostly lifted directly from the chat, but edited by me. Non chatroom segments are written entirely by me so the story flows better. We had a lot of fun with the plot that we put together. This is a sort of side project I'll be working on between chapters of Fanganronpa Twenty-Something. Hope you enjoy it!

Kaede sat on her bed in her dorm room. Her laptop keys clicked as she entered her responses before realizing she'd scrolled to the bottom of the page. She clicked the side bar and slid it back to the beginning. As she read over her questions and answers, she realized she'd forgotten to add her submission reel. Kaede opened her files, dragging and dropping her video where the page read to place it. Once she was done, Kaede gave the page one last read through before clicking on the button to submit her form.

Kaede closed her laptop and set it aside just as her phone buzzed. She sat at the side of her bed to read whatever notification she'd just been sent.

**'Shuichi Saihara invited Kaede Akamatsu and several others to join Dangan Ronpa friends~’**

  
  


Kaede sat staring at the message for a moment. She debated on whether or not she really wanted to join this group to send the message that immediately wrote itself in her mind. It bore through her life a fire in the pit of her stomach at the sight of Shuichi’s name. Kaede tapped on the notification on her phone, prompting her chat application to open and fill the screen. Several others were already online. 

The group chat was small. It included Shuichi, Kokichi, and Kirumi. All three names Kaede recognized from her school life as well as her internet life. A small group of senior high school students all obsessed with the same reality TV show, 50 seasons and counting. 

The first few messages were greetings before Kokichi sent the first photo. A poorly lit image of a Monokuma plush toy propped up by a plain white pillow. 

**Kokichi:** i wanted to show you somethign i got at the mall Shu

**Kokichi:** sorry I pressed enter too soon

**Kokichi:** here look at my new Monokuma plush.

**Shuichi:** I”M SO JELOUSE OUMA HES SO CUTE X_X

**Kirumi:** What is the meaning of this?

**Kokichi:** oh.. Hello Toko

**Kokichi:** tojo! Sorry my bad

**Kokichi:** god my fingers are just to fat im really sorry

**Kirumi:** There probably nowhere near as bad as the slobs I had to serve today.

**Kokichi:** oh.. uh thanks.

**Kokichi:** and i’m glad you like him Shuichi.. I never had the money to buy one before

**Kirumi:** Don’t brag. 

**Shuichi** : Brag about what, the money or the bear :P

**Kokichi** : o.oh did you want to borrow some money? i. i dont have much but I guess I could give you some

**Kirumi** : No, keep it. I’m not taking another loan. 

**Kokichi** : oh okay sorry for offering i didn mean to upset you.

**Kirumi** : No, no. It's not you. I would rather not add another debt to the pile.

**Kokichi** : oh.. you wouldnt have to pay me back.. i mean sorry i

**Kirumi** : Tojo's don't do charity.

**Shuichi** : whats that like ;0

**Kirumi** : Do you know what happened the last time the banks agreed to give the Tojo's a bailout?

**Kirumi** : They lost it all in a Ponzi scheme, those imbeciles

  
  


**Kokichi** : ssorry im sorry

**Shuichi** : Actually

**Shuichi** : On the topic of money

**Shuichi** : Dad just got home from a business trip :3c so I can finally finish one of my cosplays

**Kirumi** : You are ever so fortunate. ¬_¬

**Shuichi** : I'm gonna try to expand a little cuz it feels like I only ever cosplay the detectives ^^;

**Shuichi** : But I wanna finish my cosplay of Noah Caine :p

**Kokichi** : oh? really? thats bold. i like it sounds fun.

**Shuichi** : Not nearly as bold as my kyoko cosplay tho~

**Kokichi** : i liked it.. it was cute.

**Shuichi** : <3 Thank you

**Shuichi** : I need to take her to a con at some point

**Shuichi** : It's a little embarrassing to go out dressed in drag though

**Kokichi** : oh? well i support you.. even if i cant really be there. Make sure to take lots of pictures at your next con for me..

**Shuichi** : I should totally take u with me one day

**Kokichi** : i dont really have the money to..

**Shuichi** : That doesn't mean I can't pay for you~

**Kokichi** : oh. i . i couldnt. i mean.. really i wouldnt want you to have to pay for me.. how would i ever repay you.

**Shuichi** : U wouldn't have to, we're friends

**Kokichi** : realllly? y,,uo thinnk of us ass ffrri,iensd??

**Kirumi** : Mmm..

**Kirumi** : Must be nice

**Shuichi** : We need to hang out more, Ouma

**Kokichi** : r.really? o;;okay im down for that. i wou;ld like that alo.t. should i bring anything over>

**Shuichi** : Just ur cute face! ;3

Kaede rolled her eyes hard as the conversation went on. She imagined the obvious flirting from Shuichi was equally off putting to Kirumi. Kaede tapped the screen again and started typing out her first message.

**Kaede** : since when were we fuckin friends.

**Shuichi** : since never!! Welcome to the chat!!

**‘Rantaro Amami has joined the chat’**

**Rantaro** : Hey. Don’t let me interrupt.. whatever this is.

**Kirumi** : No, by all means please do. It's far too sickeningly sweet for my own tastes.

**Shuichi** : I'm just trying to share what I have with a friend

**Shuichi** : Not that either of you'd really know anything about that :)

**Rantaro** : Hey, now. Don’t be like that.

**Rantaro** : I can share something real nice, if that’s what you want.

**Kirumi** : I've had enough second exposure to get a general idea.

**Shuichi** : Ha... is that a threat? Or a promise? (＾q＾)

**Kaede** : ew.

  
  


**Kirumi** : As repulsive as ever.

**Shuichi** : Sad... but that's okay

**Shuichi** : I'm always willing to wait <3

Kaede shivered at the way Shuichi spoke to Kirumi. Disgusting, the way he’d flirt with Kokichi and then behave that way towards her anyways. 

**Kaede** : like uve got anything better to do.

**Kirumi** : You’re repulsive.

**Shuichi** : Don't forget disgusting, vile, rancid, revolting, gross, abhorrent...

**Shuichi** : Ah, and my favourite~ Nauseating

**Kokichi** : hhe isnt repulsive!

**Shuichi** : I'm okay with being called such terrible things by them, Ouma, it's okay <3

**Kokichi** : ooh aare you sure? ii wo uld prefer they came at me instead of yyou

**Kirumi** : That can be arranged if you desire.

**Shuichi** : Ah-ah... Not while I'm around~

**Kirumi** : Since when do you order us about? Am I a maid now outside of the cafe?

**Shuichi** : You could be :)

**Kirumi** : Piss off.

**Kokichi** : ii wouldnt mind you being mean to me saihara-chan…

**Kirumi** : For the love of… I think I'm going to be sick.

**Shuichi** : If you vomit Tojo-chan... you should record it and send it here…

  
  


**Kirumi** : Shuichi.

**Kirumi** : I wish you would choke on your own smegma sometimes.

**Rantaro** : Christ.

**Kokichi** : iif you wanted i could try and get a video like that for you Saihara... though i dont think you would want it being me.

**Kaede** : is ur keyboard busted or r u just that bad at typing.

**Kirumi** : I bet you would give yourself an std if Saihara asked for it.

**Kokichi** : iid do aanny thing hhe wants ffrom me.

**Kaede** : dont.

**Shuichi** : I think it's endearing that Ouma is so devoted to what I want

**Kaede** : hes as devoted to u as u are to danganronpa.

**Rantaro** : God when you put it that way, it’s really depressing.

**Rantaro** : At least some of us have a life outside of Danganronpa.

**Shuichi** : Why wouldn't I devote my life to Danganronpa..? I'm already scraping the bottom of the barrel, hah <3<3<3

**Kirumi** : Of course you find it endearing. You have a used rag at your beck and call.

**Kirumi** : Have your parents ever asked you to run away from home Ouma? Because If you were my son I would have left you in a dumpster.

**Kaede** : damn girl.

**Kokichi** : i.. i live in a n orphanage…

**Kirumi** : Oh so they did leave you after-all.

**Kirumi** : No surprise there.

**Shuichi** : And besides... it's better to be favored by the rest of the scum of society (＾q＾)

**Shuichi** : It's safer that way <3 if I want to get killed or kill someone, I might as well save it for an opportunity to show the whole world

**Kirumi** : When you're not flaunting your wealth above everyone, you're simply starved for attention.

**Kokichi** : Iif you want to kikill someone.. yyou could kkill me

**Kaede** : this is already a fucking shitshow.

**Kirumi** : Whatever. I have a shift to get to. You all stew in your filth in the meantime.

**Shuichi** : will do, maido~ (＾q＾)

**Kaede** : as much as id love to sit here and watch u eat eachother alive i have my own shitty gig to show up for.

**Shuichi** : Do you have to wear a skimpy outfit for your job Kaede? (＾q＾)

**Kaede** : no. asshole. its a record store not

**Kaede** : uh

**Kaede** : kirumi where do u work again

**Kirumi** : Fuck off.


	2. 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In light of being invited to Shuichi's chaotic group chat, Kaede decides to stay and watch the show. The bickering between them continues and Shuichi suddenly has a good deal of opposition to deal with. Especially after having allegedly spent his night with Kokichi.

Kaede’s shift came to an end and she spent the night in her apartment accomplishing very little. She watched reruns of Danganronpa as her phone continued to ping. It went off at varying speeds through most of the evening, though Kaede didn’t reach to check it. Kaede fell asleep on her couch that night. When she woke up, the notifications had stopped.  
Kaede stretched and reached for her phone. The group chat had gone quiet after Kirumi had started terrorizing Ouma. It might have been out of spite that Shuichi invited Ouma to stay at his house through the same chatroom. Tacky, Kaede thought. 

**Kaede** : kokichi you talk to shuichi like hes a sadist. Does he get off to you being uncomfortable. It wouldnt surprise me.

Kaede then set her phone aside and started to get ready for the day. She’d slept in her work clothes the night before, but luckily didn’t have a shift that night. That was enough time to get a load of laundry done. Kaede’s breakfasts were always sparse and lacked protein but she didn’t really care. She’d eat what she had and didn’t complain. Her phone buzzed.

 **Rantaro** : Sadist sounds about right.

 **Kaede** : lets bully him about it and see what he says. i think were right

 **Rantaro** : Bully who? Saihara or Ouma?  
 **Rantaro** : In any case, I’m way ahead of you, haha.

 **Kaede** : i noticed. i was thinking saihara but we can bully ouma abt being a masochist too

 **Rantaro** : I think he’d like that.

  
 **Kaede** : ugh ew youre right. damn it.

**Shuichi Saihara is online.**

**Rantaro** : Speak of the devil.  
 **Rantaro** : Hey there. <3

 **Shuichi** : Ah, you're still here. >:/  
 **Shuichi** : Wait is that Akamatsu? I see you finally came crawling back~

 **Rantaro** : You don’t sound so enthused to see me.

 **Kaede** : what dont like him? its ur group chat. if ur so upset abt ur stupid fandom fight just kick him out.

 **Shuichi** : It's complicated

**Kirumi Tojo is online.**

**Kirumi** : Perhaps Shuichi’s still recoiling from the other night.

 **Shuichi** : Unsurprising that you're bringing it up, Tojo

 **Kirumi** : How was your evening with the trash fire?  
 **Kirumi** : Did you spread some peanut butter on your sack and let him lop it up like the dog he is?

 **Kaede** : see we were just talking abt them. sadist and masochist.

 **Shuichi** : Hummm... I don't know what you're talking about all of a sudden~  
 **Shuichi** : Ohhh you mean what Ouma and I do (●´艸｀)ヾ  
 **Shuichi** : Why d'you wanna know~? Jealous? (＾q＾) <3  
 **Shuichi** : The only person that can make sense of how I really am is Ouma~ At least he takes the time to know me (＾q＾)

 **Rantaro** : Because you’re the only person that gives him the time of day.  
 **Rantaro** : He’s gross. You’re gross.

 **Shuichi** : He's not gross

 **Kirumi** : You’re both repulsive.

 **Kaede** : id say hes grosser than you but like. youre still crushing on him. which is nasty.

 **Shuichi** : I don't know what you mean~

 **Kaede** : well im like 100% sure ur sleeping with him. just seemed logical.

 **Shuichi** : He comes over and I help him learn how to cosplay. Ah it's the least I can do for someone like him

 **Kaede** : so uve seen him without his clothes on.

 **Shuichi** : I never said that <3

 **Kirumi** : I bet there’s a lot of role-playing going on behind the curtains.

 **Kirumi** : So do you dress up as Kirigiri, or do make him do so?

 **Shuichi** : I  
 **Shuichi** : Don’t crossdress

 **Kaede** : i bet ouma does. bet you make him.

 **Shuichi** : He does things that he wants too y'know

 **Kirumi** : The boy wouldn’t breathe unless you told him.  
 **Kirumi** : And honestly, that could be for the best.  
 **Kirumi** : “Oh master Saihara, please kick me again~”  
 **Kirumi** : That’s the only reason you give him the time of day.

  
 **Shuichi** : As if I need to give an actual reason  
 **Shuichi** : Especially to the likes of you…

 **Kaede** : its bc ur a sadist and hes easy.

 **Kirumi** : Just because you’re wealthy doesn’t mean you’re better than us.

 **Kirumi** : Why don’t you go blow a load into Kirigiri’s gloves?

 **Kaede** : bold of you to assume that isnt how he starts his morning kirumi.

 **Kirumi** : Fills them up, and then slaps Ouma around with them.

 **Kaede** : sounds like something theyd be into.

 **Shuichi** : I don't own a pair of those 3 but if I did... maybe i'd do that just for you and show you (＾q＾)

 **Kaede** : she gets enough attention from grown ass men. what are u 40 

**Kirumi** : Harassed, undertipped, and under appreciated. This is the existence I’m cursed to.   
**Kirumi** : But at least I’m not Ouma 

**Kaede** : ugh at least some of us dont have a choice but to be nasty. shuichi u just like it 

**Kirumi** : Do shut up about that, will you? I bet you would actually comply if someone wanted a handy under the table. 

**Kaede** : hey hey dont go projecting ur issues onto me. at least ud get paid 

**Kirumi** : Money is money, but I have my limits. 

**Kaede** : prove it maido. 

**Kirumi** : I have nothing to prove to you. 

For a moment, Kaede weighed her options. She fumbled around her apartment for a bit. No classes today, she had time to spare. Kaede found her backpack dumped aside near the front door. She opened the pockets and fished around for her wallet before taking inventory inside. Only then did Kaede choose to reply to the group chat again. 

**Kaede** : what if i was to visit your little cafe with some extra to spend then. 

**Kirumi** : I’m sorry Akamatsu, but you need shirts and shoes to be waited on. 

**Shuichi** : I have an idea   
**Shuichi** : Maybe you should sell your disgusting sweaty tights to your desperate customers~ Hhahaha 

**Kirumi** : I’ll put a pair aside just for you if you ever need something to strangle Ouma with. 

**Shuichi** : I wouldn't want something like that from you~ <3   
**Shuichi** : You're way too far below me for me to ask that with any kind of dignity in tact 

**Kirumi** : Shut the fuck up you little shitheap   
**Kirumi** : You think you’re so above everyone else? 

**Shuichi** : Definitely not everyone... I know my place <3 

**Kirumi** : You’re a joke. A blowhard.  
 **Kirumi** : And that’s all you’ll ever be.

 **Kaede** : lol bet u blowhard 

**Shuichi** : Ah, Tojo... you have such a sense of humor… 

**Kirumi** : Kirigiri should’ve stayed dead in season 3. 

**Shuichi** : I see that Tojo-chan has a death wish even further beyond what I first thought :)   
**Shuichi** : I was going to save my first kill for someone special when I finally made it into Danganronpa, but if I have to make an exception to get rid of someone like you, I will <3 <3 <3 

**Kirumi** : You think you have what it takes to kill me?   
**Kirumi** : Your birth certificate is just an apology letter from a condom factory   
**Kirumi** : I would love nothing more than to watch the color fade from your eyes as I mangle you like a dog waiting to be put down 

**Shuichi** : You'd kill someone like me?   
**Shuichi** : I knew your standards were low… <3 

**Kirumi** : At this point, it feels more like a mercy killing if anything.   
**Kirumi** : Your parents should’ve used a coat hanger when they had the chance. 

**Shuichi** : At least my family can still support me financially <3 

**Kirumi** : You motherfucker   
**Kirumi** : You stupid son of a bitch, go inhale a cumjar!   
**Kirumi** : Fuck you! Eat shit Saihara! I’ll tear you limb from limb for that!   
**Kirumi** : Fuck off! I hope you end up in the street like that piglet you’ve taken in! 

**Kaede** : guess this is a bad time to ask about the cafe prices for dinner and a show. 

**Kirumi** : Fuck you. Fuck you both! I know exactly where to hit you so it’ll hurt 

**Kaede** : the tit. careful. u dont know what im into. 

**Kirumi** : I hope you’ve enjoyed railing Ouma, Saihara. Because I’m going to beat him to a pulp. 

**Shuichi** : You think taking it out on someone even weaker than you is gonna help? Really? 

**Kirumi** : It wouldn’t be the first time, why’re you so surprised?   
**Kirumi** : If I beat you down, you’d probably jizz your pants   
**Kirumi** : But...If I beat your little mutt up, you’d have no one to role play with for a good while~   
**Kirumi** : Well, aside from your gym socks 

**Shuichi** : You really think I'm gonna let you get away with something like property damage? 

**Kirumi** : Incredible   
**Kirumi** : Putting him down would really just be a mercy killing, wouldn’t it? 

**Shuichi** : No not at all   
**Shuichi** : Don't you know? He'd do anything for me <3 <3 <3 

**Kirumi** : And that’s exactly my point. He would better off rotting in a grave 

**Shuichi** : He doesn't have any standards if it's me <3   
**Shuichi** : At least he's happy with me 

**Kaede** : nobody is happy with you. hes just a bottom. 

**Shuichi** : I'm the only one who can treat him "better" than he gets treated on a consistent basis <3 <3 <3 

**Kaede** : sounds to me like ur just another freak shuichi. 

**Shuichi** : No... that's wrong... Ouma-kun would do more for me than he would for any of you... That's so much more meaningful 

**Kirumi** : I wonder how much he’ll be able to do for you with a broken leg. 

**Kaede** : damn. ur awful 4 each other. its people like u that give me no reason to believe in humanity. 

**Shuichi** : Ouma just being around me is enough to make me feel like less of a monster (＾q＾) 

**Kaede** : ya bc hes getting u off jackass. 

**Shuichi** : At least he has the option with me... if it were anyone else, they wouldn't be so forgiving. Even so... I make him feel better 

**Kaede** : he wont feel better when he realizes you treat him like a sex toy.   
**Kaede** : you called him property. Scumbag. 

**Shuichi** : But if people know he belongs to someone... they might leave him alone :)   
**Shuichi** : At least they will if they know what's good for them. 

**Rantaro** : Like you know what’s good for me. 

**Kaede** : oh god are you fucking him too. 

**Rantaro** : He wishes. 

**Shuichi** : I wouldn't let you within 2 feet of me like that, Amami. 

**Kaede** : i meant fucking ouma dumbasses. we already know u 2 r hard for each other. 

**Shuichi** : No, he's not   
**Shuichi** : And he won't 

**Kaede** : not fucking ouma or not hard 4 u 

**Shuichi** : Both 

**Rantaro** : No promises <3 

**Kirumi** : You’re all talk Saihara   
**Kirumi** : The only way you’re ever in control, is with Ouma 

**Kaede** : bet if you showed him what you really think of him ouma would fuck off just like everybody else. 

**Shuichi** : He already knows exactly what I think of him   
**Shuichi** : If he didn't, I wouldn't be talking so much so publicly, right? I'd want to hide it~   
**Shuichi** : But I've got nothing to hide <3 

**Kaede** : get ur head out of ur ass shuichi. hes just the mukuro to your junko enoshima and one day youll be all alone without him. 

**Kirumi** : Perhaps I’ll do both legs now… 

**Kaede** : tf r u talking abt over there 

**Kirumi** : Oh, I was just going to jump Ouma.   
**Kirumi** : Because Saihara thought it would be a wonderful idea to trifle with me. 

**Kaede** : hey. if you jump him in ur work outfit u could make a few extra bucks online. ill even help you advertise. 

**Kirumi** : I’m not going to make a bloody show out of it. Besides, no one would pay to see Ouma 

**Kaede** : of course not. they pay to see u. 

**Kirumi** : I’m not advertising myself.   
**Kirumi** : I’m shaking Saihara. Honestly I am. I will be oh so frightened when you come after me...   
**Kirumi** : Tears streaming down your face   
**Kirumi** : Whatever will I do~ 

**Kaede** : well ur gonna have to deal with me first. im still gonna stop by the cafe later. 

**Kirumi** : Stay away from my job. 

**Kaede** : even if im a paying customer?

 **Kirumi** : Tch...   
**Kirumi** : Whatever 

**Kaede** : listen. even if i did show up i wont try shit. that would be too far.   
**Kaede** : besides your job sounds like it sucks hard. 

**Shuichi** : Fitting for someone like her :) 

**Kirumi** : If you want to go, I can’t stop you. But that doesn’t mean I won’t spit in your drink 

**Kaede** : psh. like id eat at a maid cafe. just take the damn tip. and a chill pill while ur at it. 

**Kirumi** : Like I would accept money from you. 

**Kaede** : why not. you really do hate me huh. 

**Shuichi** : She just thinks she's too good for handouts even though she needs money like a leech needs blood… 

**Kirumi** : It’s funny, a parasite like you calling me a leech.   
**Kirumi** : And Akamatsu, of course I do. You’re awful like the rest.   
**Kirumi** : But you’re no Saihara. If that counts... 

**Kaede** : it isnt a handout if shes at work tho   
**Kaede** : what are you afraid ill look up ur skirt like a man. i have imagination kirumi 

**Kirumi** : I don’t see why you want to visit me so badly in the first place. 

**Kaede** : because i feel bad 4 u. Duhh. ur pathetic. 

**Kirumi** : I don’t need your goddamn pity. 

**Kaede** : just like u dont need my money right. 

**Kirumi** : Tch...Of course I don’t. There are other customers. 

**Kaede** : other customers who look up ur skirt. 

**Kirumi** : Whatever Akamatsu. Fine, come. It’s not the first time a classmate laughed at me.   
**Kirumi** : Just...don’t make this a habit. 

**Kaede** : deal. 

Just like that, Kaede had a reason to log out for now. She finally had somewhere to be today. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yep, this continues to be the darkest story on my account so far. Again, special shoutout to my Discord buddies for most of the dialogue and allowing me to adapt it! Thank you for reading!


	3. 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My notes usually go at the end of the chapter, but this is an exception! This is a trigger warning! This chapter depicts harassment while on the job from men much older than Kirumi as well as bribery from them. Heads up, this is the darkest chapter so far!

As soon as Kaede stepped into the cafe, the dimness inside made her shutter. Fluorescent light cast shadows onto a burgundy interior. Tables and chairs were all occupied by exactly the type of men Kaede wouldn't want to meet. Several of them leered in a way that reminded her of Yamada or Teruteru while a handful carried a distinct energy similar to that of Kazuichi. The only distinction between these men and those characters was the obvious age gap they had. 

The building smelled of smoke, alcohol, and grease from the kitchen. Kaede could see food being prepared in the next room from the dining area. She picked a single seating table as far away from the other patrons as possible. As Kaede moved, she could feel eyes roaming down her back. Kaede sat and twisted her face into as unpleasant an expression as possible. She was suddenly very thankful to be under the cover of a plain grey and oversized hoodie.

Kaede scanned the inside of the cafe for a familiar face and when she found it, she nearly felt she would be sick. Kirumi Tojo stood two tables away, clearly waiting to be noticed as her eyes were on Kaede’s as well. A hand belonging to one of the more Hifumi-type patrons was roaming up her thigh.

Acting on pure disgusted instinct, Kaede waved Kirumi towards her. She feigned interest in the menu propped up at her table though the hoped the tension in her face conveyed an air of frustration rather than repulsed concern.

Kirumi didn’t blink for a moment, though she continued to stare. Kaede waved to her again, and Kirumi’s face suddenly became an infuriated red tint. As Kirumi started making her way towards Kaede’s table, the distinctly Hifumi-like man planted a smack to her rear. Kirumi winced and she walked away faster. Kaede, on the other hand, tensed her fists and clenched her jaw. Revenge was a pleasant fantasy that she often took part in.

“What can I get for you today, madame?” Kirumi’s voice was completely deadpanned and her expression distant. Kaede tried to avoid staring at her uniform for too long. Not that is wasn't tempting, but the idea didn't sit well with her.

“Okay, first of all, you can fuck up that guys food,” Kaede nodded towards the man Kirumi had just left, who had decided in the meantime he was going to leer at one of her coworkers instead. “Just pin it on me if you get caught. Secondly, I’ll just have miso ramen.”

“Smartass. I was planning to do that ready,” Kirumi retorted sharply. Her eyes seemed more focused. A sense of pride welled in Kaede at that. 

“Great. In the meantime, the more meals ruined, the higher your tip.”

"Miso ramen. Hold the spit," Kirumi noted. Perhaps she was trying to get a laugh out of Kaede. If she was, it somewhat worked. Kaede’s only reply was a snide grin. "You're just going to keep giving and giving for each meal I tamper with?" Kirumi’s eye twitched at Kaede’s expression.

“If you’re a coward, just lie about it. It isn't like I can go and check. Think of it as an excuse to make your job a bit less one-sided. These people want to treat you like shit. I can give you an excuse to treat them right back.”

Kirumi let out a sigh. “Fine,” she finally said. "So be it. However, my shift is very long, and I don't expect you to stay the entire time."

"Like I would stay here longer than I have to. This place is a cesspool. Just find me again later if you need to or something."

"Very well." Kirumi did a small curtsey and Kaede bit back her mockery. As Kirumi turned and walked towards the kitchen, she ignored several requests to sit on a patrons lap or to twirl in a circle. Kaede felt ill hearing it.

Something about a place like this existing at all did nothing but splinter Kaede’s already fractured opinions. In a world that allows places like this to exist, what reason does anybody have to keep going? It was a thought experiment she found herself considering often and her response was always the same. Cowardice, Kaede felt. The simple fact of the matter was Kaede Akamatsu was afraid of dying. She’d rather live in her own misery. In a way, she disgusted herself with that thought every chance it had to worm it’s way into the forefront of her mind.

When Kirumi had returned with ramen, Kaede half expected to find a pile of half dissolved salt or pepper sitting in the base of her cup. To her pleasant confusion, Kaede found no such thing. As if to contribute to the surprise, Kirumi had brought her own food. 

“Break time?” Kaede asked.

“Thankfully,” Kirumi responded flatly. In front of her was cold tea, a piece of old cake, and a slice of plain bread. “Do you ever recall a time when it was easier?” She promptly asked.

"Sure I do," Kaede said. "When I was a stupid little kid who didn't realize how fucked up everything is. Self-awareness killed me years ago." 

“I believe I was around the same age. A sheltered child who didn’t understand why we suddenly lost our extravagant mansion. Back when the name Tojo meant something. Now it’s just the butt of a shitty joke.” 

Kaede looked down at her ramen and then back at Kirumi. "You can have some. Unless you made it awful just for me."

“It’s the one meal I didn’t tamper with this evening.”

"Have a taste," Kaede offered. " your lunch is tiny."

"Consider yourself lucky," Kirumi replied in a snippy tone, staring at the ramen. She glanced back and forth, seeming a little paranoid as food was offered to her. She leaned forward and quickly took a taste. "That never happened," Kirumi muttered, chewing quietly.

"What never happened?" Kaede asked, somewhat amused. "I didn't see anything."

“Heh... Maybe you’re not all bad. At least not like those two sods.” Kirumi murmured gently, resting a hand under her chin.

"That's the highest compliment I've been given in years," Kaede smirked slightly. She decided to focus on Kirumi instead of the people staring at them.

“...What?” Kirumi asked in annoyance. “I get this enough from the other shitheads here.”

"I'm not eyeing you up. You'd know if I was," Kaede defended. "Just focusing on the only other face in this room not belonging to some crusty old man here to get his rocks off."

Kirumi raised a brow and shrugged. “I suppose the only other place worth staring at is the mouldy ceiling. You get used to the stench, eventually. Being around Saihara enough helps too.” She sneered.

"I can agree to that one. Saihara is just gonna turn into one of these old perverts someday. Kokichi will leave him and he'll find solace in taking advantage of someone else until he goes too far. He'll be locked away someday, I know it."

“Bold of you to assume Ouma would ever leave Saihara. When you’re that broken, you don’t have anything left to lose...” Kirumi trailed off. “He’s going to end up dead in a ditch if I don’t put him there first.” She rested a hand under her chin and chuckled. “After all, what right does Ouma have to live?”

"More right than me, I'd say," Kaede rolled her eyes. "As far as I know he might actually want to die.”

“I’m surprised you haven’t died yet. Given how hopeless you sound.” Kirumi mused. “I have a family to restore and a restaurant to burn, and that’s all I’m hanging onto.”

"Just because the world is hopeless doesn't mean I'm not going to need to be dragged out of it kicking and screaming. I'm going to fight. Everything is bullshit but I'll still fight."

“Admirable. But it’s a losing battle, really. One person can’t just change everything. Unless you nuked it and started over.”

"I always get a boost of confidence from kicking the system in the teeth.” Kaede huffed. “You probably know how that feels, right."

“There is something so exhilarating about knocking the teeth out of these obese goblins,” Kirumi nodded slowly. “I don’t often get to do it. I cherish the moment when possible. Of course, it’s still only removing one vermin from an entire plague of them.”

"One less crusty old pervert for you to worry about. I can respect knocking the teeth out of someone who tries to fuck you on the job."

Kirumi seemed to relax a bit more the further their conversation lasted. “This is all perfectly natural for them as well. This lifestyle. I’m barely a person to them. They view all the women here as walking sex dolls.”

"Psh, they could at least try to hide it like other men do." Kaede huffed and looked cautiously around the restaurant. “These ones? Predators, all of them.”

"There's a baseball bat behind the dumpster. It's around the alleyway in the back. I keep it there 'just in case.’" Kirumi mused. "I've even lined it with nails." Kirumi stood up. "I have to get back to my shift."

"I'll see you around," Kaede replied as Kirumi left. 

Kaede paused to finish her food before she was ready to leave. She then realized Kirumi had forgotten to take the tip she was promised. Kaede swore under her breath at the broken promise. She decided she would leave for now and come back at closing. Besides, Kaede wanted to keep talking. 

When the sun was starting to dip behind skyscrapers, Kaede came back. Kirumi looked surprised to see her return. 

"One minute," Kirumi said. She put the last chair up before heading out the door to meet Kaede. "Nearly seventeen meals," she said. "All from seventeen different assholes."

Kaede counted her money "sounds realistic to me," she said before handing it to Kirumi. "Revenge sure is sweet."

Kirumi’s eye twitched as she hesitantly reached out for the money. She looked away as she snatched it and stuffed it down her top. “Indeed it is."

Kaede cackled a bit. "No need to put on a show after hours," she said sarcastically.

"I'm not just going to hold it in my hand all night. Imbecile." Kirumi spat bitterly.

"I know, I know. Damn, your uniform designers need to learn what pockets are. Unless they like when their employees hide cash in their cleavage. I definitely don't mind that though," Kaede chuckled.

"I bet you one of my patrons designed these," Kirumi remarked with a harsh expression.

"Asking for one more reason to use that bat you talked about," Kaede agreed.

"Do you want to see it?"

"The bat or the other reason to use it?"

"The bat," Kirumi's authoritative voice is deadpanned for a moment. "I wouldn't waste it on you. Besides, we may end up needing it considering what you mentioned earlier." The maid started down the alleyway and kneeled down reaching behind the dumpster. " It smells like absolute shit back here, but- aha! " She yanked out an old wooden baseball bat with rusty nails beaten into the end of it. " What do you think? "  
  
"Looks like tetanus waiting to happen," Kaede commented wryly. "Nobody is gonna mess with you after a whack from this"  
  
"I'm pretty sure it's given some nasty cases of tetanus already," Kirumi looked over the bat proudly before promptly handing it off to Kaede. " Go on and take a few swings at the trash can. You would be surprised how cathartic it can feel. "  
  
"Aw, sweet!" Kaede gladly took the bat from Kaede. She turned to the trash can, pretending it was the face of the man she'd seen groping Kirumi earlier. Kaede let loose a swing that rung against the metal can, sharp vengeance echoing down the alleyway.  
  
  
"It almost makes it worth it," Kirumi trailed off for a moment. " Whether its a classmate or some patron, it just feels good. " She rested a hand under her chin. " It's rare to see you actually enjoy doing something for once. "  
  
By the time Kaede had stopped swinging at the trash, she was breathing hard. "You're right, I like it," Kaede said. "Just another way to say 'fuck you' to this shitty world."  
  
"It's the little things, you know? Sometimes I pretend it's Saihara. Other times its Shinguji. Or Hoshi. " She paced up to Kaede and looked her over. " Pitiful as it is, another way to spit at the system is always welcomed. "  
  
"I figured I'd aim for low hanging fruit the first time around. Like that asshole who was clinging to you when I first showed up. The dent in this dumpster is what should have happened to his skull. "  
  
"Alright, I must know," Kirumi crossed her arms. " Why do you even bother with me out of all the other degenerates in our class? "  
  
"Part of it is pity," Kaede admitted. "The rest of it is probably just being an emotional high school girl."  
  
Kirumi raised a brow. She looked visibly annoyed. "I don't need some fucking pity from-"  She muttered.  
  
"What? Pity from what? " Kaede interrupted. " While we're talking about letting out frustration, let me hear what you think. I won't hold it against you. "  
  
"I hate everyone, but there are different degrees of hatred. If that makes any sense. " Kirumi paced over to her and took the bat from Kaede. She turned to the trashcan and let out a swing. "You're always stuffing yourself into other's business! You're trying to get our piece of shit classmates to change! " Each sentence was punctuated by another swing.  
  
Kaede stood by and watched as Kirumi swung at the trash can. She internalized every word, knowing it was true. She kept her word, though. She doesn't hate Kirumi for it.  
  
After a few pounds, Kirumi let out an exaggerated breath. "That did make me feel better." She mused. "Maybe you oughta do the same. Whether it's Saihara or me. I'm sure you hold some resentment towards me. I did give Ouma a few nasty bruises over the semester. " She proudly proclaimed.  
  
Kaede took the bat from Kirumi again and hummed before readying herself. "You still have the attitude of a spoiled brat!" She swung at the trash can. "Despite being lower than the rest of us!" Another swing. "You hurt other people who didn't do shit to deserve it," yet another swing. " And you're not even the worst of us! " One last swing.  
  
The disgraced heir couldn't help but let out a small chuckle. She was right. Every word of it. "Alright, you've made your damn points." She snapped back, furrowing a brow.  
  
Kaede let out a huff as she handled the bat to support her weight. She held the end to the ground and leaned on the handle. "So, we still hate each other?"  
  
Kirumi ran a hand through her hair and leaned against the wall. “I have a strong hunch you don’t hate me.” She moved a lock of hair out of her face. “However, there will be a time when I restore what is so rightfully mine.”  
  
"I hate the world, not necessarily the people fucked over by it. But you hate me. What does this have to do with 'rebuilding what's rightfully yours? '"  
  
Kirumi paced up to Kaede and glared her down before leaning in. “So I can rub it in your face when I’m above you all once again.” She whispered gently.  
  
Kaede's breath hitched as Kirumi was so suddenly in her space. "And then you'll leave us all to rot like we deserve, right"  
  
She placed a single finger under Kaede’s chin and pushed it up slowly. “Surely you know the answer to that already.” She stepped back. “Do you think I like hearing that Saihara pissed in Ouma’s cornflakes and then force-fed it to him?”  
  
"At least use your influence to grind Saihara into the mud before you go. Or even cover it up when he finally fucking disappears," Kaede's voice has dropped in volume as Kirumi continually drifted closer.  
  
Kirumi thought it over and let out a frustrated sigh. “I suppose if I was going to do one good deed in my lifetime, that could be it." She was practically wrapped around Kaede at this point. She stood just close enough to only be holding her chin.  
  
"You can get away with anything if there's enough money to burn."  
  
“What are you? My shoulder angel and devil? ” Kirumi scoffed as she took a few steps back to move out of Kaede’s grill. “ And what would you do for me? ”  
  
Kaede let out a breath as Kirumi drew back. "If I were rich? You'd just want the money. "  
  
"Obviously. But it seems as if you want something more. "  
  
"Don't be a gold digger, Kirumi,"  Kaede joked with an almost villainous grin.  
  
Kirumi shrugged to herself. "You act as if I would follow in the footsteps of my parents. No, when I am a queen once again I'll need no one else. "  
  
"Then I guess there'll always be people who want to see you in bed."  
  
“More or less. I do suppose I’ll have some servants of my own too. I’ll never need to lift a finger again or come back to this shithole. ”  
  
"Servants so you never have to deal with suitors? What, will you be hosting tryouts? " Kaede cackled.  
  
“I deserve to be waited on hand and foot.” She proclaimed. “Naturally, I wouldn’t hire anyone incompetent. Only the best of the best! ”  
  
Kaede chuckled again, thinking Kirumi may have missed her implications. "You'd have to test them all, huh?"  
  
Kirumi’s expression shifted into one of rage as she realized what Kaede was accusing her of. She kicked the beaten up trash can down the alleyway before turning back again, anger still obvious in her face. “Go fuck yourself, Akamatsu.”  
  
"That's fair," Kaede didn't flinch at the loud clatter. " Just keeping up the tension. I know there's no fixing it. May as well enjoy pissing you off while I can if you're gonna disappear on us all for something greater. "  
  
"You're really laying it on thick," Kirumi huffed. "It almost sounds like you'll miss me. I can't imagine why. " She scoffed. " Perhaps it's because of how great I am. I suppose that's only natural. "  
  
"You're just as much of a bitch as me and you know it," Kaede retaliated. " The only difference between us is where we came from. We're fucked up like crazy. All we have is whatever shit the world decides not to take from us. "  
  
Kirumi really hated agreeing with her, but in a sense she was right. "Alright, alright! You made your point. " If anything she was a fierce fighter. It's the only reason why she worked at the maid cafe. "Well, you've proven yourself. You're a piece of shit, but you're not the biggest piece of shit. "  
  
"To be fair, the bar is pretty low. Shuichi is a bigger piece of shit than both of us combined. We could be so much worse. "  
  
"You aren't wrong about Saihara and his pet." She nodded in agreement. Kirumi swung the bat over her shoulder and started out of the alleyway. "Well, are you coming? And did you find a new place to stay for the night? " She snarked.  
  
"You're inviting me?" Kaede sounded a bit taken aback. She paused thoughtfully before trailing after Kirumi. "You're not as much of a piece of shit either."  
  
"Consider it a privilege. After all, it's considerably safer to traverse together. " The heir scoffed. " You saw what men are like. "  
  
"Men are pigs," Kaede commented. "You're right. I'd rather be in the company of a woman with a bat," she smiled snidely.  
  
"Absolute animals." She nodded in agreement. "feels like all the good ones are extinct. Not that I would care in the first place. "  
  
"Women don't need men, anyways," Kaede grinned.  
  
"That may be one of the most sensible things you've said all evening."  
  
"I always suspected you felt that way," Kaede replied. "Men. Who needs em? "  
  
"After a few months of slaving away coupled with our incredible classmates, they've completely turned me off."  
  
Kaede laughed. "Are you telling me the story of your lesbian awakening?"  
  
"Not literally. I mean, Amami is decent enough. Even if he believes he's better than everyone and everything. "  
  
"For some reason, I doubt you'd actually subject yourself to dating him."  
  
"Would anyone? That only one suitable enough for him is probably a cardboard cut-out of himself. "  
  
Kaede laughed even harder at this. "Yeah, I bet!"  
  
Kirumi let out a small laugh. “The one good quality he has is getting under Saihara’s skin."  
  
"Any girls you find more appealing?" Kaede teased. "Trick question, nobody is more disgusting than Saihara."  
  
“Girls, hm?” Kirumi thought aloud. “Most of them are bearable. It’s more so measuring whose less trashy than the others. ”  
  
Kaede nodded. "Does being trashy for the sake of your job count?"  
  
“You have a job?” She retorted back.  
  
"Oh, shit!" Kaede laughed loudly. "I didn't know you could be this funny!"  
  
“I have my moments. Or so I’m told," Kirumi mused back. “You just need to wait for the right opportunity.”  
  
Kaede calmed down her laughter. "It was a good one. You get full points for that. You're such a bitch," this was followed by giggling.  
  
“Thanks, I try.” Kirumi giggled back putting a hand over her mouth. “You’re not so bad yourself. At least you can take it. ”  
  
"I learned to dish it out from taking it," Kaede shrugged. " Don't take that out of context. "  
  
“As much of a bitch as you can be, you’re somewhat tolerable.” Kirumi shrugged back. “Let’s say I don’t break Ouma’s leg. What then? ”  
  
"What, are you trying to impress me by convincing me you're a good person? We both know you're not"  
  
Kirumi scoffed. "Why would I need to impress you?" She pointed the bat at Kaede. "I just said I'd pass on breaking his legs. That's all. "  
  
"Then what's with the sudden change of heart, huh?" Kaede said smugly, though she eyed the end of the bat warily.  
  
"For fuck's sake," Kirumi said with a roll of her eyes. "I'd love to wipe to that stupid smirk off of your face." Kirumi lowered it down. "Because- because..." She narrowed her eyes, wincing and muttering under her breath. "You're not so bad even though I'd love to knock your teeth in."  
  
"You're such a fucking tsundere," Kaede giggled. "There are ways to knock a smile off someone's face without them losing teeth."  
  
"I can think of several others. Like a swift punch to the gut. Like those I've given to the troglodytes in that restaurant. Did you see the way they looked at you? "  
  
"I was pretending not to. Any more attention and they'd just get hornier. Is the punch for me or them? "  
  
"Them. Despite how much of a shit you can be, I don't think I would actually beat you up. "  
  
"Well, how else are you gonna wipe the smirk off my face," Kaede huffed confidently.  
  
"I've got one idea," Kirumi smirked and leaned in close before, grasping the back of Kaede's head.   
  
When she was grabbed, Kaede's first instinct had been to expect not waking up ever again. What she received instead wasn't at all the head trauma she braced herself for but it did also succeed in wiping the smirk off her face. Kirumi kissed her. She then let go of Kaede and began to walk away.  
  
"The tsundere thing was a joke!" Kaede called. "I didn't expect you to prove it!"  
  
"Fuck you!" Kirumi shouted over her shoulder. She stopped in place and spun on her heel, the bat over her shoulder. "I thought it would persuade you to shut up, but you're still going," She said, her cheeks were beat red. "Maybe I should've just beat the shit out of you."  
  
"That was supposed to get me to shut up? Why would I shut up after that- that opens up a lot of questions! The goal was to make me stop smiling and to your credit, it worked but I'm confused. Not in a bad way, though? "  
  
"Because that tends to work on-" Kirumi nearly blurted something out she shouldn't have. She stopped at the last minute and shook her head a little. "Nothing. It's nothing. Just forget it happened, or I'll kill you instead! "  
  
"Wait a second," Kaede catches up with Kirumi "You've used that to shut people up before?" A part of her feels almost hurt by this. That it wasn't anything kind. "Patrons?" This added question only made the feeling worse.   
  
Kirumi's expression darkened slightly. "Don't you ever shut up?" She asked with a fierce glare.  
  
Kaede froze at this, noticing Kirumi's aggressive expression. "Were you lying about me being different?" She balled her fists slightly.  
  
"The money," Kirumi put a hand to her face. " How could I turn down that much in a single instance? " She took a few steps back. " A ten or a twenty and I'd gladly give them a taste of this bat. But several thousand? " Kirumi pressed her back to a wall and sank to the floor.  
  
"Wait, I- oh-" Kaede suddenly realizes what Kirumi might be implying and promptly drops her joking confidence. " You don't need to do anything for the tips," she said before realizing how stupid that was for her to say. "Oh, God- wait , fuck , that was dumb- "   
  
She raised a single finger before standing up and dusting herself off. Kirumi pulled herself together and took a deep breath. "I wasn't lying about you being different. Just don't tell anyone. " She gulped hard before letting out any elated sigh. " You're so fucking foolish sometimes. "  
  
"Yeah, I thought we established that," Kaede joked weakly as if testing to see if it was alright to try for a laugh again. "Me being an idiot" but on the other hand, she was internally elated as well.  
  
Kirumi let out a slight laugh. She shook her head back and forth and stood up again before dusting her skirt off. "Well now that we got past that dreadfully awkward patch."  She trailed off, averting her gaze at Kaede.  
  
"Right. Awkward. " Kaede looked over at Kirumi. Her gaze lingered on Kirumi's lips for a moment before returning to her eyes. "Do you want one back? If it was different? "  
  
"I always thought you wanted to suck off Saihara."  
  
"Oh please, when I was a tiny elementary school kid, I thought friends and boyfriends were the same thing. There are better things to suck on than his sorry dick. "  
  
"What a surprise. A time when we all had innocence. In any case, if you wish to bind yourself to one who has nothing left to lose it's your funeral. Don't think I'm suddenly going to get all lovey-dovey, either. You're still a piece of shit in my book. "  
  
"Who said I expected that to change?" Kaede crossed her arms. "Nothing wrong with hate kissing. You could still leave bruises or suffocate someone if you really tried. It's just different from punching teeth in. Feels nice in a different way. "  
  
“It’s awfully twisted no matter how you try to piece it together. But I won’t make you lick my feet or whatever Saihara saw on the dark web these days. ” She snickered to herself. “ Nor would I ever bring you home. ”  
  
"You don't need to, this doesn't need to leave the alleyway if you don't want it to. I couldn't give less of a shit, honestly. Your call. "  
  
“Good. I think I would gag if we started to act like a traditional couple. I’m unopposed to flaunting you off, however. Even if you are just a commoner. Dating a Tojo could do wonders for you. ”  
  
"Flaunting? What do you mean? " Kaede looked back at Kirumi quizzically. " I'm not in it for attention or some shit. I do what I want. "  
  
Kirumi raised a brow. "Surprising.” She chuckled before taking Kaede’s hand. “Then perhaps I’ll do the same.”  
  
"I think we want the same thing anyway," Kaede commented as she relaxed her hand under Kirumi's.  
  
Kirumi nodded in agreement. “It’s not bad. I was expecting your hand to be a lot more clammy. ”  
  
"I've got cold hands,"  Kaede said. "It's always been like that. Don't use them as much as I should I guess? Maybe if I took up a hobby, I'd be able to get my blood flowing. Your hands are nice. "  
  
“It’s like holding a corpse.” Kirumi taunted back. “What do you even enjoy doing when you’re not pushing yourself into everyone else’s business anyway?” Kirumi asked.  
  
"I don't have any hobbies. I'm just some teenager who likes Danganronpa too much," Kaede grumbled.  
  
“Aren’t we all?” Kirumi trailed off. “If you ever become as brain dead as Saihara though I’m dumping your ass. Got it? ” She yanked on Kaede’s hand and began walking off. “ Besides, I happen to like the cold. ”  
  
"Listen. If I ever start acting like Saihara you have my full permission to fucking kill me, I swear to God." Kaede laughed as she followed Kirumi along.  
  
“Noted. I’ll make it quick and painless. ” Kirumi snapped back with a small sneer. “ What was it he said? I’d hide the corpse, and no one will ever find you. ”  
  
"If it ever gets to the point where I think I ' m not a shitty person, you 'll know it ' s time for me to be on the receiving end of that baseball bat. Just leave me in the trash can, and you can beat me up whenever you want! "  
  
“Your rotting stench may even deter some of the patrons away. So at the very least, your death will have some meaning to it. ”  
  
"That's the spirit," Kaede cackled. "What else am I gonna make of my life anyways."  
  
“Not much. Just like the rest of the masses. ” Kirumi giggled. “ But if by some chance you don’t end up in a dumpster, I think you would make a fine footstool for me. ”  
  
"Don't get too kinky, I might suspect you're picking up Shuichi's habits yourself," Kaede joked.  
  
“Fuck you.” Kirumi let out a small laugh. “Keep your bite. In fact, never get rid of it. I’d rather have someone that can fight back. ”  
  
"I've gotta be prepared in case you get tired of waiting for an excuse to use that bat and decide you're sick of me," Kaede chucked back  
  
"I wouldn't expect you to go down without a fight. Keep me entertained and I won't get sick of you. Sound fair? "  
  
"Sounds like a deal," Kaede replied.  
  
As the two of them walked down the alleyway, Kaede's phone buzzed. She ignored it.  
  
 **Tsumugi Shirogane has joined the chat!**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thank you for reading!


	4. 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While trying to welcome Tsumugi tp the group chat, Shuichi and Kirumi get into a fight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gotta add another heads-up to this chapter for non-graphic descriptions/implications of pornographic content.

**Tsumugi:** My name is Tsumugi Shirogane, but please... you can call me Tsu! It's a cute nickname. I'm a friend of Saihara's! :D

**Shuichi** : shirogane-san... you actually did join?!

**Tsumugi** : Well, I wasn't going to let you sit back and drop your opinions about DR without me!

**Shuichi** : ugh, the last few seasons have been a snooze fest

**Kaede** : the only good part was the twist with the cook and the butcher.

**Tsumugi** : Ah... it's like the team doesn't even look at fan input anymore... :(( It's so upsetting!

**Tsumugi** : They used to read feedback on all the social media sites, but for the past couple of seasons, it feels like there's just no heart or soul poured into it!

**Tsumugi** : Sorry if I get rambly! I have a lot of conflicted emotions about this... I'm a long time fan

**‘Tenko Chabasihara has joined the chat!’**

**Kaede** : heyyy i know that name   
  


**Tenko** : Hey everyone! Sorry I’m late. What’re we talking about?   
  


**Shuichi** : just how much of an absolute trainwreck this season of dr has been :P

**Tenko** : I’m sure if the ratings drop, maybe they’ll have a change of heart?

**Tsumugi** : You would think that, yes...

**Tsumugi** : Fingers crossed! 

**Shuichi** : Tsumugiiii isn’t there something you can dooooo

**Tsumugi** : Hey, if I could I would but that isn’t my job!

**Kaede** : since when could you hold a steady job.   
  
**Tsumugi** : Haha, Kaede. You’re jealous of me~   
**Tsumugi** : The new job has been great, though. A real dream come true!   
  
**Shuichi** : Please tell us about what it’s like!   
  


**Tsumugi** : Well, it isn’t anything too special. I don’t get to see new episodes before they come out or anything, but I do hear snippets of spoilers here and there. 

**Tsumugi** : I’m not supposed to read any of the rough outlines I have to pass on from person to person, but I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t snuck a peak. I can’t help it! I just need to know what the next episode has in store!

**Kaede** : heyheyhey. What happens to the butcher

**Tsumugi** : Oh he gets backstabbed by the baker!

**Kaede** : I KNEW IT   
  


**Shuichi** : tsumugi!! Use the spoiler tags!!

**Kirumi** : Damn it, you’ve ruined the characters arcs for the rest of us.

**Kaede** : i totally fucking called that. i knew it. i was right

**Kirumi** : Yes, yes, whatever. Quit rubbing it in.   
  


**Kaede** : make me. Maido

**Kirumi** : I’ll wipe that fucking smugness off your face.

**Kokichi** : ssorry for being late, but Tsumugi your job ssoudns exactly like something you ccould use to have some influence

**Kirumi** : Oh who knew the deviant had a way for deviancy.

**Kaede** : wow kirumi. usually you can do better than that

**Kirumi** : Fuck you, it’s been a rough week.

**Kaede** : why dont you tell me abt it then

**Kirumi** : If I didn’t know any better I’d say something has gotten into you.

**Kaede** : id say it has but i wont letcha know what

  
  
**Rantaro** : Holy shit, just take it to DMs. We get enough nasty mushy stuff from Ouma and Shuichi and I don’t want it clogging up my phone.

**Tsumugi** : ...Is this what you guys do?

**Shuichi** : mostly, yeah, but sometimes we talk about Danganronpa (＾q＾)

**Tsumugi** : Aw come on, I didn’t come here to see you people flaunt your fucked up relationships! I thought you wanted to hear about my internship…

**Kirumi** : We are not in a relationship.

**Kaede** : ill let u call the shots babe

**Shuichi** : of course we want to hear about your internship~!! 

**Rantaro** : You sucking up to Tsumugi won’t get you on the show any faster, Shuichi.

**Tsumugi** : I dunno, it might..!

**Kirumi** : Well now we know where Ouma gets it from.

**Shuichi** : you ought to be nicer to him, Kirumi >:(

  
  
**Kirumi** : Why? What’ll you do about it? He's my favourite stress toy.

**Kokichi** : did i do something wrong.. iim sorry. .

**Kirumi** : Speak of the devil. 

**Kirumi** : Hey Ouma, I’d love to show something after class today.

**Kokichi** : rreally? you want to spspend time with me after class?

**Kirumi** : Kaede, why don’t you come with us? I know I’ve told you all about the fun I have after a long day.

**Kaede** : wait are you being serious

**Shuichi** : O_O

**Kirumi** : Of course I am. We’re going to have so much fun.

**Kokichi** : Ffun? with me? rreally? should i bbring something?

**Kirumi** : Just yourself. Oh, and Shuichi isn’t invited. This is just for you.

**Shuichi** : Ò_Ó

**Kirumi** : I’m just simply following through on a little promise I made to him.

**Kokichi** : oh? iif its for saihara ill do anything...

**Kirumi** : Good. Then you can meet for a little surprise for him.

**Shuichi** : WAIT NO

**Shuichi** : Tojo do you ACTUALLY have a death wish???????? :))) Because IT CAN be arranged! The best part is, it'll all be a secret~ I'm great at keeping secrets... like hiding spots… Nobody would ever even find the corpse!

**Kirumi** : I am absolutely shaking and sobbing. /s

**Shuichi** : That's not an empty threat

**Shuichi** : It's a promise

**Kokichi** : iim so cconfused.. i though ttojo-sama just wanted tto have fun with me..

**Shuichi** : That was a lie   
  
**Kaede** : her idea of fun was destructive

**Kaede** : fun 4 her. not 4 u.

**Kaede** : she keeps a baseball bat behind the cafe she works at. she showed me

**Kokichi** : wwhat? o..oh did she want to bbeat me up aagain?

**Kokichi** : sshe should hhave just said so.. iits okay..

**Kaede** : again

**Kaede** : shes kicked ur ass before??

**Kirumi** : Of course I have. This is no surprise.

**Kokichi** : iill let hher beat me uup again if sshe wants

**Shuichi** : No

**Kokichi** : i deserve iit…

**Shuichi** : No no no no no

**Kirumi** : Good, let's skip the formalities then. You know where I want you.

**Kaede** : kirumi thats fucked up. listen to him hes fucking broken

**‘Shuichi Saihara has gone offline’**

**Kokichi** : nno?

**Kirumi** : He's only this way because he let's himself be walked on. He's been broken.

**Kaede** : hey. tojo you hate me too right. come beat me up instead. change it up a bit. how about that.

**Kokichi** : saihara?

  
  
**Kirumi** : Same place, same spot. Or else.

**Kaede** : hey just send me okay. wont that be exciting. youve never kicked my ass before.

**Kaede** : i could shut up and everything.

**Kokichi** : iim okay with h-her beating me.. iits okay

**Kirumi** : Fine, Kaede. If you’re so adamant then you can be next.

**Kaede** : no. you dont get to fuck me up unless you let the other guy go. look at him he cant take that shit. something happened to him kirumi. dont contribute to him being fucked up.

**Kaede** : talking shit on saihara is one thing but beating up ouma is another entirely

**Kirumi** : Kaede a night in the hospital is far better than an afternoon with Saihara.

**‘Shuichi Saihara is now online’**

**Shuichi** : HEY KIRUMI LOOK WHAT I FOUND OF YOU ONLINE

**‘Shuichi Saihara uploaded an image’**

**Kaede** : wHOA

**Kirumi** : Ah??????

**Rantaro** : Holy shit, what website are these from?

**Kirumi** : WHaT THE FUCK

**Kirumi** : HOW DID YOU FUCKING

**Shuichi** : Stop threatening Ouma, or I’ll send another!

**Tsumugi** : ple as e do

**Kirumi** : You...Listen slut, I’ll mangle you alive if you send another one so help me

**Tenko** : That’s so lewd..!

  
  
**Kaede** : ...kirumi are you wearing your work uniform in that picture

**Kirumi** : Don’t fucking look down on me! The shit was...SHUt UP

**Shuichi** : dw tojo, everyone's seeing every angle of you, not just down (＾q＾)

**Kirumi** : Oh you’re doing that fuckin thing where you act like a pig because you’re so insecure Saihara?!

**Kirumi** : FUCK OFF

**Kaede** : i mean. i was looking forward to seeing you i just didnt think it would happen like this

**Kirumi** : FUCK. OFF.

**‘Kirumi Tojo has gone offline.’**

**Kaede** : ...is anybody else kinda worried

**Kaede** : she has a bat

**Shuichi** : well if you’re so concerned why don’t YOU go talk to her~? 

**Kaede** : fine if you wont then ill do it myself

**Shuichi** : this entire thing was a bad idea.

**Rantaro** : Oh you think so??

**Shuichi** : Shut up. I’m removing the picture. This was a really bad idea.    
**Shuichi** : This includes if anybody saved it. I want that photo gone. Are we clear~?

**Tsumugi** : This is some wild shit, Saihara

Kaede took a deep breath. Through the whole situation, she’d been left feeling a lot of things. Frustrated, flustered and confused. She was fearful, too. For what Kirumi might say to her next. Kaede’s face felt warm, but it could’ve been for any reason at all. She couldn’t quite trace which of the threads could be traced back to her blushing the way she was. That and her dry mouth. Her burning throat. Kaede opened a new private message thread with Kirumi.

**Kaede** : hey are you okay. 

**Kaede** : that was crazy what happened i wanted to check in

**Kirumi** : im not in the mood

**Kaede** : no games this time. 

**Kirumi** : No games.

  
  
**Kaede** : just this time.

**Kirumi** : I just had my ass put on screen in front of everyone. no I’m not alright

**Kaede** : i did not expect that. the pics i mean. i didnt know shuichi had that kind of dirt on you

**Kirumi** : Yeah well I didn’t either. now you know! those pictures were just...don’t get the wrong idea..! FUCK

**Kaede** : heyhey im not here for throwing assumptions. if theres something to tell its up to you im not gonna push.

**Kirumi** : im never going to live this down. Saihara is going to lord this over me for the rest of my life.

**Kaede** : funny you mention saihara. i have quite the screenshot for you. its him feeling remorse.

**Kirumi** : what do you mean?

**Kaede** : he says he feels bad. hes removed the photo too.

**Kirumi** : I don’t need his fucking pity after the stunt he just pulled.

**Kirumi** : Listen. we were going to lose our heating and winter is coming up. tips were getting shorter

**Kirumi** : I had to do something

**Kaede** : hey i figured that mightve been the case and its okay. its shuichi who should be ashamed of himself.

**Kirumi** : Shuichi isn’t the one who flashed their ass to half of the chat

**Kaede** : that wasnt his choice to make and he made it anyways. he *should* be ashamed of posting what he did and it hurt you. ill teach her a lesson myself if ive gotta

**Kirumi** : thanks i guess. I shouldn’t have even picked that fight in the first place. I just feel like dying in my bed

**Kaede** : hey no dying until your sorry ass is on danganronpa

**Kirumi** : fuh, right. of course. I suppose I should thank you

**Kaede** : why

**Kirumi** : if you don’t want my thanks ill take it back. It was for checking in on me if anything

**Kaede** : oh. thats okay. just not used to being thanked thats all. youre welcome

**Kirumi** : right, that’s reasonable. we’ve never done anything worth a thank you in our lives beforehand

**Kaede** : accurate.

**Kirumi** : so, what now? i show my face in there im even more of a laughing stock

**Kaede** : i think theyre more focused on scorning shuichi than laughing at you. and if not ill talk them down. Ive been looking back and forth between dms and group chat

**Kirumi** : whatever. it’s not as if my pride can be stomped on anymore

**Kaede** : what pride. never stopped you before

**Kirumi** : what’s left of my name. being a Tojo used to mean something once upon a time

**Kaede** : so you keep telling me. well. maybe you can make it something else. instead of chasing the past

**Kirumi** : wym something else? i mean no one is exactly buying up architecture...and our assets are all gone. I keep saying I’ll claw my way back to the top, but what? what else do I chase?

**Kaede** : a name in tv. remember

**Kirumi** : right...how foolish. Danganronpa is my last resort

**Kaede** : youd better make it. you belong on that show

**Kirumi** : tell Tsumugi to make them write me a good arc, okay?

**Kaede** : do we include the link to your onlyfans or is that a mention only sideplot

**Kirumi** : fuhu, fuck you. 

**Kirumi** : make it a side plot

**Kaede** : that can be your secret if they do the secrets motive thing. oldie but a goodie

**Kaede** : maybe thats why you kill. somebody pulls a shuichi and you come after them with a bat lol

**Kirumi** : lol that would be nice~ i may as well put those skills to good use

**Kirumi** : but I must admit, i don’t exactly feel like caving someone’s head in for once...the very thought was cathartic. a wonderful way to relive my anger when i was mocked

**Kirumi** : but whatever this is, it worked

**Kaede** : i guess its a good thing i came to check on you then. i figured you wouldnt want to be online but i might as well update you

**Kirumi** : if I get the urge or anything...ill find a trash can later or something and put Saiharas face on it

**Kirumi** : but I digress. Thanks for the update

**Kaede** : youre welcome babe

**Kirumi** : mmm, i don’t mind being called that

**Kaede** : thats good. i dont mind calling you that


	5. 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kirumi and Kaede spend time together after Kirumi's shift at work. Fight Club spoilers!

**Kaede** : i fell asleep the fuck did i miss.

**Tenko** : I insulted Kirumi on accident,,,

**Kaede** : i mean. thats nothing new.

**Tenko** : I didn’t mean to upset her!

**Kaede** : not to talk shit or anything but. shes just like that youll get used to it

**Tenko** : I just feel kind of weird about it? Part of me wants to apologize but does she always yell like that?  
  


 **Kaede** : shell cool down eventually. we yell at each other all the time. its a better outlet than her coming around with a bat. just dont harass her at work or anything

**Tenko** : ?? Does she carry the bat with her??

**Kaede** : not technically. She keeps it behind the building.

 **Kaede** : she works at a maid cafe. old guys get off to it. her job is basically to stand there and get harassed in a skimpy dress and take orders. she has the bat for a reason

**Tenko** : That’s degeneracy..! Can’t she get another job?? There must be something better!

**Kaede** : i honestly doubt it was her first choice but i dont actually know. she does have weird ways of shutting people up about shit she doesnt wanna hear or talk about

**Tenko** : She can be abrasive, yeah…

**Kaede** : i mean like. confusing weird. like i had to ask to clarify what her goal was weird.

`Kirumi Tojo is now online.`

**Kirumi** : Weird, am I?

**Kaede** : yeah arent we all. we were legit talking about that. about how fucked we all are  
  


 **Kirumi** : Nice save.  
 **Kirumi** : And for the record, I’m only putting myself through hellish torture for the tips.

 **Kirumi** : So I suppose you’re right, that does make me as equally fucked.

**Kaede** : see. were all fucked up and weird

**Kirumi** : Well, whatever...The curse of the lower class. I’ll escape it eventually.

**Kaede** : whatever princess.

**Kirumi** : Whatever yourself bitch~

**Kaede** : pft- slut

**Kirumi** : You have such a way with words.

 **Kirumi** : Which shitty indie song did you pick that one up from?

**Kaede** : calling you a slut or thinking everybody is shit

**Tenko** : I guess a lot of indie music is like that, now that I think about it

**Kaede** : every shitty indie song sounds like that tenko

 **Kaede** : i work at a dying record store and have to listen to the same shitty songs all goddamn day

**Kirumi** : Maybe when that store goes out of business we can break a few cds~

**Kaede** : bring ur baseball bat hun

**Kirumi** : Like you even needed to ask.

**Kaede** : dont make me swoon lol.

**Kirumi** : Otherwise maybe I’ll go to your job and find what pisses you off. So we’ll be even on that front.

**Kaede** : indie music bitch its what i deal with all day do u really wanna subject urself to that shit too

 **Kaede** : i am not giving you the playlist of shitty songs that piss me off. uve gotta find em urself

**Kirumi** : You’ve seen how petty I can be.

**Tenko** : You would sit through playlists of music from a genre you hate specifically to make a playlist that’ll annoy Kaede?

**Kaede** : and they say romance is dead.

**Kirumi** : You started it and I'm going to finish it~

**Kaede** : i did not start this youre the one who made it gay

**Tenko** : Whoa what??

**Kirumi** : Don’t even start with me.

 **Kirumi** : When do you leave work

**Kaede** : why do you ask

**Kirumi** : I don’t want to go home after my shift.

**Kaede** : wait for real

**Kirumi** : Do you want me over or not bitch?

 **Kirumi** : Just don't bore me.

**Kaede** : ill try to piss u off instead

**Kirumi** : fuhuhuhu~, of course, you will. I'll do the same, otherwise, I wouldn't bother with you.

**Kaede** : get a load of that anime maid laugh. Lol

**Kirumi** : Shut the hell up, Akamatsu.

**Kaede** : once were hanging out ull only have to deal with it in person

**Kirumi** : At least here I can turn mute you whenever you manage to piss me off.

**Kaede** : but u never do

**Kirumi** : You're. really asking for it, skank.

**Kaede** : bring it then

**Kirumi** : Well unlike some people, when Im called out I follow through.

`Kirumi Tojo is now idle`

**Tsumugi** : Holy shit, are they always like that?  
  


 **Shuichi** : Well I'm not going to stop them <3  
  


 **Tsumugi** : Right. They have a weird dynamic.

 **Shuichi** : At least they aren't boring, right?  
  


 **Tsumugi** : I guess.  
 **Tsumugi** : Anyways, I was looking to invite my brother to the server!  
  
 **Shuichi** : does Korekiyo even like Danganronpa?  
  


 **Tsumugi** : I'm working on it.

\---

Kaede heard a knock on her apartment door. She stood up, her right forearm in a cast she'd failed to mention to anybody who didn't need to see her with it. She opened her door with her non-dominant hand. Kirumi was outside in the hallway with her arms crossed, surveying the hallway. She was still in her work uniform.  
  
"You look pissed off,"  Kaede commented.  
  
Kirumi rolled her eyes. “I always look like this. I suppose I expected better. That's all. ”  
  
"Expected better? From me? That's a new one. You coming in or not? "  
  
“I may as well before I get mugged out here.” Kirumi stepped forward and Kaede stepped aside to let her in. As Kirumi passed her, she looked over Kaede's cast. If she had a snide remark brewing, she wouldn't use it. Or mention the injury at all.  
  
"You think you're joking, but that's actually a good call," Kaede said as she held the door for Kirumi.  
  
“Really? In your own building? ” Kirumi scoffed and sat down on the couch. “ So, this is your little abode. ”  
  
Kaede closed the door once Kirumi was inside. "I moved out on my own super recently. This is it; the big place. Parents aren't too far away, but I'm keeping them at a distance. "  
  
“A wise move. They’ll just hinder you if anything. I can’t wait to get away from my own, personally. ”  
  
"The freedom is nice, I guess. It would be better if everything wasn't awful, but it's still nicer than living with them. "  
  
“I resent my own for the hole they put me in. But at the very least your place is quiet. No noise. No fighting. No having to hide when debt collectors come knocking. ”  
  
"I don't have anything going on today, stay as long as you like."  
  
“Are you certain about that?” Kirumi asked, raising a brow. “Fine, but only because you’re so vulnerable with that wrist of yours.”  
  
Kaede raised her hand slightly, wrapped in bandages. "Mmhm. Stupid injury, honestly. "  
  
“Those look like they need to be changed.” Kirumi murmured before she leaned in slightly to stare Kaede's cast. “Honestly, don’t you even take care of yourself, dumbass?”  
  
"Are you offering to do it for me?" Kaede smirked.  
  
“I have too. Otherwise, who's going to throw punches at forty-year-old virgins with me? ” Kirumi retorted smugly.  
  
  
Kaede let out a laugh "Oh, right! Almost forgot about date night, ha! "  
  
“Some date night if you ask me,” Kirumi said as she carefully undid Kaede’s bandages. “ Keep still, you whore. Otherwise, it’s going to hurt a lot more. ”  
  
"It takes one to know one. You and your hand fixation," Kaede couldn't help but smile.  
  
"I don't have a hand fetish, now shut up and let me work." Kirumi glared at her silently for a second before returning her attention to the bandages. "It's important to let it air a bit too. But of course, some skank like you wouldn't know that. "  
  
"I'm starting to think you might be a sadist, too, honestly," Kaede said as she looked at her hand.  
  
Kirumi looked up and raised a brow. "If I ever start to give off vibes like those two, I invite you to just put me down on the spot. Where do you keep your other bandages? " She asked with a huff.  
  
Kaede held back a laugh "You're obsessed," she commented. "Washroom, medicine cabinet."  
  
"You bitch." Kirumi laughed to herself and stormed off. She returned with fresh bandages. "Alright, let's get this over with. Since I'm far more capable of doing this. "  
  
"You kind of insisted, but I'm not complaining," Kaede shrugged.  
  
“Right. Just don’t get off to this. ” Kirumi murmured as she carefully wrapped the bandage over Kaede’s arm.  
  
"I can't promise anything once you're gone," Kaede teased.  
  
"You can be such a piece of shit." Kirumi scoffed. "There! Done. "  
  
"Thanks, bitch," Kaede chuckled.  
  
"Anytime, slut." Kirumi giggled back before sitting on the couch.  
  
"If you're looking to watch TV, nothing much is on today. Maybe you like boring cooking shows though, I never asked. "  
  
“Not even any Danganronpa reruns? At least with those, we can have a good laugh over the execution. ” Kirumi rolled her eyes. “ We could rent a movie if you desire. ”   
  
  
"Danganronpa reruns aren't on channels I have until tomorrow," Kaede groaned. "A movie sounds slightly less awful."  
  
“I suppose a movie it is then.” Kirumi shrugged. “It's better than the local news. Or a cooking show. Fucking really? A cooking show? ”  
  
"Maid cafe." Kaede said, deadpanned "It was an educated guess. "  
  
"Fuck off." Kirumi snapped back crossing her arms. "Like that dumpster fire would even serve real cuisine."  
  
Kaede chuckled again. "So, what would you rather watch instead? You're the guest. You pick. Something violent, I bet. "  
  
"Oh I don't know, I bet you enjoy your fair share of violence too. There's a trashcan in an alleyway somewhere that can attest to that. " Kirumi tapped her chin, as she thought. " I don't know, what's popular these days? "  
  
"Shit, I'll have to look something up," Kaede fumbled for her phone with her non-dominant hand. " Fuck- wait. Wait, I can do it. Damn it. "  
  
“You’re so useless.” Kirumi will say sarcastically and take out her own phone. The screen is cracked badly. Kaede is almost awed that it's even still in one piece.  
  
  
"That phone screen reminds me of the trash can," Kaede pointed out.  
  
“It’s certainly seen better days. I threw it at someone once. Lost my temper. ” Kirumi's eyes glossed back at Kaede. “ Fight Club sounds fun. ”  
  
"Fitting," Kaede agreed. "Let's watch it."  
  
“Maybe we can get some new ideas,” Kirumi chortled to herself.  
  
"All the more reasons to watch the movie together, then."  
  
“Perhaps we can pick up some snacks while it torrents then.”  
  
"Got any specific ones in mind?" Kaede asked. "Corner store isn't far from here if I don't have it."  
  
“I usually prefer sweets whenever I have a chance to watch something.” Kirumi pondered. “Maybe a stiff drink if I’m annoyed.”  
  
"I've got drinks. Are you annoyed yet? "  
  
“Ask again in about twenty minutes or so.  That’s usually how long it takes you to get under my skin. ”  
  
"Perfect, I'll do my best to keep interrupting the movie then."  
  
“And I’ll try shutting you up as usual.”  
  
"Same was like last time? Because that wasn't much of a punishment for being a dick as it was reinforcement. To continue being a dick. "  
  
“More or less. You already have one busted wrist, so I’ll be merciful. Well, last time, I got you to shut up regardless. ”  
  
"I was only shut up because your mouth was blocking mine," Kaede laughed. "After that, it was right back to bullshit."  
  
“Glad I pulled away before I could taste any of it.” Kirumi sneered to herself and shifted closer to Kaede.  
  
"What, do you have a stopwatch? I can't insult you if you're kissing me. "  
  
"No, just instinct." Kirumi sneered with a small wink. "Besides, you'd have to push me that far in the first place."  
  
Kaede smirked at Kirumi. "If you want to get back at me so bad, why don't you give pushing a shot, then?"  
  
"You want me to push you that way for once?" Kirumi smirked back. "If you insist, you dirty blond skank. I must wonder how many mirrors you've cracked with that face of yours. "  
  
"None, you blind fuck." Kaede has also shifted closer at this point, getting very into their banter. She faked a pout for a second before cracking up a bit.  
  
"Honestly, the worst thing about you is how you just get into everyone's business. When it clearly is none of your own. It makes me wonder how badly you want to score with the others. " Her eye twitched at that pout before also shifting closer.  
  
"What I say next is gonna depend on what you mean by 'score,'" Kaede said. "Besides. Discussions in a group chat aren't exactly private anymore, are they? "  
  
“It seems to be a place where everyone can just dump their dirty laundry or complain about the newest season.” Kirumi sneered. “And yet you insist on fighting a losing battle.”  
  
"Everything is a losing battle. Living, having hope. I guess I'm just a coward who doesn't want it any worse. "  
  
“You really don’t make this fucking easy, do you?” Kirumi said, gritting her teeth slightly. “This place is Hell enough as is and you’d rather be a flickering light.”  
  
"I'm too scared to just die. You know me," Kaede smiled briefly.  
  
“It’s your most annoying quality.” Kirumi glared. “Everyone has a breaking point except you.”  
  
"You just haven't found it yet."  
  
“Threaten you and another person just gets in the way. Tell you to fuck off, and you come closer. You are infuriating. ”  
  
"Kiss me again,"  Kaede practically demanded.  
  
“I’m off the clock. I don’t take orders. ”.  
  
"You'd rather I didn't shut up, then?"  
  
“Have I ever said how much I despise you?” Kirumi murmured and leaned in slowly. The heir narrowed her eyes and cursed under her breath, before forcing her lips against Kaede’s.  
  
Kaede once again moved closer to Kirumi, but stopped herself from wrapping an arm around her. She wasn't sure Kirumi would take well to being held against someone else. Anyone else.  
  
Kirumi grasped at Kaede and pulled away from the kiss. "That silence was music to my ears." She chortled.  
  
Kaede hummed. "See? Told you it would work. "  
  
The maid rested comfortably against Kaede. "Where would I be without you calling me a bitch every now and then?"  
  
"Without anyone you can yell at and lock lips with. I bet the garbage wouldn't make that great a substitute. "  
  
“No, it wouldn’t. But at the very least I can pummel the garbage without feeling ba-“ She stopped herself and cleared her throat. “But you raise a fair point.”  
  
Kaede raised an eyebrow "I totally heard that. You're so gay. "  
  
“Can it, slut,” Kirumi muttered impatiently under her breath. “You’re even worse.”  
  
"Maybe it's worth it just to push your buttons. Maybe I don't hate you as much as I used to. Kissing you is nice. ”  
  
"I would be lying if I said I still hated you as much as I used to." Kirumi ran a finger through her hair. "You're my most well-behaved customer for starters."  
  
"That's not exactly hard, though," Kaede shrugged. " Your customers are the worst. "  
  
"No, it's not." Kirumi shrugged back. "But you're the only one to show me some decency. Even if you are a complete bitch. "  
  
Kaede laughed hard. "Love how this has become a competition."  
  
"Do you really expect me of all people to be outshined?"  She asked teasingly.  
  
"Yes," Kaede sneered.  
  
“Well, I sternly refuse. Even to the likes of you. Otherwise, I feel things would get dull too quickly between us. ”’  
  
"That's fair," Kaede nodded. " I can't be winning all the time. "  
  
“Finally, another thing we can agree on.” Kirumi sneered.   
  
"Whatever, I'll go easy on you," Kaede retorted. "Just until you've got thicker skin"  
  
"My skin is plenty thick as is." She snapped back. "Don't look down on me..." She trailed off with a pout.  
  
“Well clearly.”  Kirumi bragged and ran a finger through her hair. “There’s plenty to look at after-all,” The waitress bragged.  
  
"I can't argue with that. You self-centred fuck," Kaede giggled.  
  
"You're not so bad yourself. Even with a busted wrist. " Kirumi smiled back. Her eyes carried an unfamiliar warmth to them. Her tone was sincere.   
  
"Aw, a genuine compliment for once? That's new. "  
  
"Don't get used to that. But yes I felt you earned it. "  
  
"Earned it? How? " Kaede seemed genuinely confused.  
  
“What do you mean how? I just felt it was deserving. That’s how. ” Kirumi winced a bit when she was asked that.  
  
"But all I do is berate you. Oh my God, are you into that? "  
  
“No! Absolutely not! I’m not like Ouma," Kirumi shot back with an offended glare. “You came to the cafe and made work tolerable for one evening and then allowed me over. That’s how you earned it. ”  
  
"Hm," Kaede tilted her head. " I guess I wasn't as awful as I could've been. "  
  
“You’re clearly off your game,” Kirumi smiled again, her voice taunting.   
  
"Shut up, you don't mind it," Kaede smirked.  
  
“Keep talking like that I can make your wrists match.” Kirumi sneered.  
  
"How are you gonna do that?" Kaede's expression shifted to a sly grin. "At least kiss me again before taking such a big step."  
  
"Talk about killing a moment, but I suppose I walked into that one." Kirumi glanced to the side, hiding a small blush. Despite her condition, Kirumi continued to return Kaede's teasing. "Is that how you broke the first one? Who knew you were that inexperienced. "  
  
"It's by choice," Kaede admitted.  
  
"I must admit I'm surprised. With how much you ran your mouth. "  
  
"Listen, there was absolutely nothing in it for me to sleep with the people who'd asked me for that. No way was I going through with it. They didn't care. I didn't care. Why the fuck would I go through with it? " Kaede is ranting a bit.  
  
Kirumi blinked, surprised. She silently rested a hand under her chin and raised a brow. "That's an admirable quality." She finally replied. "You may be a complete and utter bitch, but at least you're honest."  
  
"Why shouldn't I be? I haven't got shit to lose,"  Kaede replied, noticeably less energetic than she had been.  
  
"I don't know. I think you must have something you would care to lose. "Kirumi scoffed, poking Kaede's cheek. Kirumi laid down on the couch and rested her head on Kaede's lap.  
  
Kaede looked down at Kirumi. She thought to herself before lightly running one hand through Kirumi's hair, despite her common sense.  
  
Kirumi seemed to wince at first from the touch but soon relaxed. She actually looked peaceful. “Mhm...” She let out a satisfied hum before instantly shutting her mouth in surprise. “Fuck- forget that just happened.”  
  
Kaede blushed before looking straight ahead of her at the blank screen. She bit back a remark and instead replied with a quick "right sure whatever-"  
  
Kirumi sat up quickly and put a hand over her chest. “Shit...” She swore under her breath. Kirumi couldn’t recall the last time she made herself so vulnerable.  
  
"I won't do anything you don't want!" Kaede suddenly blurted out, still avoiding direct eye contact.  
  
Kirumi raised a brow as her smile curved into a smirk. She rubbed the back of her head. "Relax. You look quite flustered. " Kirumi said, placing a hand on her cheek. " I would not either, for the record. "  
  
Kaede can't avoid looking at Kirumi once she's touched her face. She takes a breath. "... Okay"  
  
"Fuck me- way to go Tojo, you made this incredibly weird." The heir looked away. "Look, why don't we just watch that movie and forget what happened."  
  
"The movie still sounds nice, but I don't think I want to forget-" Kaede stops herself and glances away before looking back again. " Your hair is really soft. "  
  
Kirumi's face began to slowly turn red as Kaede complimented her. She glanced aside and cleared her throat. "Is that so? Well, then I-I can't exactly stop you there, can I? " She rubbed the back of her head. " Your lap is comfortable. "  
  
"You can lie down while we watch the movie if you want!" Kaede's voice broke.  
  
Kirumi blushed slightly and nodded. "Ri... Right. I guess if you're offering. Stupid bitch... " She looked away and leaned against her again, crossing her arms.  
  
Kaede reaches for the remote and turns on the TV "Uhh- looks like it's done downloading," she observed.  
  
"Finally," Kirumi went to lay down again but hesitated for a moment. She glanced at Kaede before finally allowing herself to relax a little.  
  
Kaede would be lying if she said she was paying any attention to the beginning of the movie. Though Kaede was looking at the screen, she was more entranced by the feeling of brushing her hand through Kirumi's hair  
  
Kirumi tried to focus on the movie , but Kaede 's touches were very soothing to her.  She let out a small cooing sound before flushing red. "This narrator is very relatable!" She suddenly choked out to divert the subject.  
  
"I don't think we're supposed to like him," Kaede replied, still only half paying attention.  
  
"He's pathetic, a tourist, and devoid of life. He reminds me of the average working man in our world. Marla seems alright to me as well. " Kirumi mused as she shifted in place a little.  
  
"Have you watched this movie before?" Kaede asks, concerned that Kirumi doesn't realize how it all ends.  
  
"Not really." She mused. "It must've slipped under the radar for me. That and who has time to watch a movie these days? " She asked.  
  
"I won't spoil it, then." The idea of Kirumi relating to this instils a sort of bitter concern in Kaede.  
  
"He's dreary, but he has weird chemistry with Marla. I bet they end up together. " Her eyes flickered back to Kaede and then to the screen. " Although he does seem to really like that man on the plane. "  
  
"No spoilers for you," Kaede replied jokingly. "Trust me, it's worth it."

"Is the big twist that he's actually gay?" She asked sarcastically, although she seemed to lean forward a little. "They're beating on each other?"  
  
Kaede looked at Kirumi, finally "That's the kind of movie you'd want, isn't it?"  
  
"If I wanted male on male action, I'd go rewatch season twenty-six of Danganronpa." She scoffed. "Although..."  She giggled a little as the unnamed narrator and Tyler kept hitting each other. "You were right, I'm enjoying this. He even owns his home. I can't believe he's single. " Kirumi suddenly began to sit up a little. " I wonder if this is how Danganronpa started. "  
"Yeah, that's probably accurate," Kaede chuckled.  
  
"Well, no one's killed each other yet," She trailed off. "Hmm, I'm a little surprised he's not jealous his friend just took Marla away like that. I thought for sure they would be together. "  
  
"Maybe they're all sharing," Kaede joked.  
  
"Don't be absurd. The narrator clearly has the sex drive of a paper bag. " Kirumi scoffed.  
  
"Maybe he needs help with it, and that's why they're sharing."  
  
"So I'm expected to believe Tyler is just warming her up for the narrator?" She narrowed her eyes. "He's become so pale living in Tyler's shadow."  
  
"That's important for the story," Kaede said as she started lightly braiding a small part of Kirumi's hair.  
  
Kirumi didn't seem to mind her hair being braided. She leaned her head back a little to let Kaede do so. "Why are they suddenly a cult now?"  
  
"That's just how it worked out," Kaede hummed.  
  
"Just worked out? Did the beatings become boring? " Kirumi asked raising a brow.  
  
"When you get into a habit, you end up wanting more, right?" Kaede said, half paying attention to the movie "He wanted more"  
  
"Yes, I understand that sentiment. They lose the edge after a while. " She arched her back a little. " Well, he could've taken Marla back- oh. "  
  
Kaede also falls silent as she watches the screen, waiting for another reaction to build from. It had been a while since she'd seen the movie, but she remembered it. It was definitely a lot to take in.  
  
Kirumi's eyes widened a bit as if a sudden realization came over her. She hadn't seen this twist coming at all and opened her mouth to speak , but closed it again and put a hand over her mouth letting a small gasp. She went silent as she grasped at Kaede's hand in anticipation.  
  
Kaede paused the braiding and held Kirumi's hand instead, deciding not to say anything about that right now.  
  
Kirumi squeezed Kaede's hand and clung close to her. Her grip grew stronger with each passing moment. "Fuck," She muttered under her breath.  
  
"That's why I told you I wasn't gonna spoil it," Kaede said.  
  
"You son of a-" Kirumi couldn't help but chuckle to herself. "So they were sharing." She snarked back.  
  
This made Kaede crack up laughing "Yeah, they were sharing! "  
  
"Fuck you." Kirumi also burst into laughter. "Well, we made it this far. I can't wait to see how this shitshow plays out. "  
  
Kirumi winced as the next scene played out. The main character blew a chunk of his head out and dropped down. " He's still alive after that? "  
  
"Not entirely," Kaede replied.  
  
"He has a hole in his head and his cheek," Kirumi scoffed. "Well at least one of him got the girl." Kirumi watched as the city began to blow up around them. "It's bittersweet, in a way."  
  
Kaede hummed and nodded. "I figured this was a good choice for a movie. Was I right? "  
  
"I enjoyed it. I couldn't see that twist coming at all... " She sat up slightly, slowly getting off of Kaede's lap. " I suppose I should take back what I said earlier. "  
  
"Which one? You said a lot of things. "  
  
"I said I could relate with someone who feels somewhat empty and devoid. But it turns out he was dangerous. "  
  
"Yeah. We aren't supposed to like the narrator or Tyler," Kaede hummed. "I guess you related more to the circumstances than the person."  
  
"I can understand having that mindset. Where life is boring, and one desires more or an escape. " Kirumi said aloud. " But not everything else that went along with it. "  
  
"It would scare me if you did, honestly."  
  
"If I ever become that far gone, you have my permission to put me down." She sneered.  
  
Kaede smiled, " I don't think you could ever go that far. "  
  
Kirumi smirked in return. “I very much doubt so myself. But if I get on Danganronpa and they make me the Ultimate Anarchist, you have my full permission to murder me. ”  
  
"Then I'd have to die, too," Kaede said, her smile fading a bit. "Well... Maybe then I won't be afraid of that leap anymore. "  
  
"Who knows, maybe you could get away with it." Kirumi pondered aloud. "Just make it good. I am certain by then I would not have any fear either. At least then I'll be remembered. "  
  
"We'd better make our auditions good if we're gonna make it in together."  
  
"I plan on making it in. Naturally, it would do wonders for my name.  Even if I'm executed or murdered, at least we'll be remembered. "  
  
"That's true. And I could really make a statement about how little real hope there really is for the world. "  
  
"I suppose if all else fails, being remembered is good enough for me." She crossed her arms. "I can't wait. I'm sure everyone will latch right onto that. "  
  
"I won't be able to make my point alone."  
  
“That works for me. I'd rather be dead than face public humiliation. "  
  
"That's the limit, huh?"  
  
"You're telling me you wouldn't? Could you imagine if I was some boring Ultimate without a backbone? I'd want to be the one everyone loves to hate. Not the comical relief. "  
  
"I don't think you need to worry about that. You'd make horrible comic relief. "  
  
"I bet Ouma would be a great comic relief character. Or Saihara. You would make a good murderer. "  
  
"I bet you would too. Remember the first time they did a double murder case with two killers? That was awesome. "  
  
"Thank you," Kirumi chuckled. " That was a fabulous season. With the twins and how they kept trading places to throw people off during the trial. I wish the writers would be that bold again. "  
  
"Maybe they just need the right personalities again," Kaede said. "What would your talent be?"  
  
"God, anything but a maid. Please. Affluent Prodigy, Fighter, Yakuza, Gang Leader... Just one who leads instead of one who serves. What about you? "  
  
"Hm. Something impressive. Something I couldn't achieve here. Anything. "  
  
"Don't tell me you want to be the protagonist.  They get so corny after awhile. Hope good. Despair bad. We'll live for a new day, etc., etc."  
  
"What if I was different?" Kaede mused. "They have to change it up sometime soon."  
  
"How would you do it then?" She asked. "What would do if you had full control as the protagonist. Who would the love interest be, and how would you defeat the mastermind? "  
  
"Easy," Kaede scoffed. "One of my least favourite tropes in Danganronpa is the plot armour. Sure, there's an optional bad ending that they pull as a PR stunt now and then, but the protag always makes it. What if this time the protag was the killer? "  
  
"I believe they haven't done something like that since season two..." Kirumi trailed off. "Well, they were not exactly the killers but it was close enough." She recalled crossing her arms. "Still a villain protagonist that gets away with it would be most interesting. You've really thought this through. "  
  
"Thanks," Kaede smiled and leaned into Kirumi.  
  
Kirumi relaxed against Kaede. "It's certainly original. Coupled with your nihilism I don't see how you wouldn't get on. "  
  
"Maybe if they don't want me as a contestant, I can be a writer. I'll make sure you get a good arc. "  
  
"Well with fifty-one seasons, and more on the horizon I doubt you'll be out of work anytime soon. Make me a real bastard. " Kirumi smirked.  
  
"You don't need my help with that," Kaede smiled.  
  
"Hah," Kirumi rested a hand under her chin. "Well, good luck to you. I'd say you have a fair shot of making it. "  
  
"You too, everybody loves the asshole characters"  
  
"Could you imagine if they made me some sorry sappy character? I had better be the asshole that tampers with the crime scene at every given opportunity. "  
  
"They've gotta give you a baseball bat, too."  
  
"Hmm, in that case, I should become the Ultimate Gangster."  
  
"You'd make a good one," Kaede said. "Just don't go pulling a Fight Club."  
  
"I am Jack's utter disbelief," Kirumi said deadpanned before slowly smirking at Kaede.  
  
Kaede replied with trying and failing to hold back a laugh "Stop, I can't take you seriously"  
  
Kirumi broke into a small laugh and covered her mouth. "I am Jack's canned laughter." She giggled and rested against Kaede some more.  
  
This didn't make Kaede's attempts not to laugh any easier "You're a fucking dork," she giggled.  
  
"Okay, okay..." Kirumi held back a laugh of her own. "I'll drop it before I start imaging some handsome stranger steps through the door and offers me a bar of soap." ’  
  
"Don't make me jealous," Kaede fake pouted.  
  
"You can be Marla if anything. We'll 'share' you. " Kirumi trailed off, before snickering yet again.  
  
"I don't know if anybody else would be able to handle two of you, but I wouldn't mind."  
  
"Well it would still be just one of me, wouldn't it? I would just beat myself up. "  
  
"And I'd try to stop you."  
  
"Please, for the love of God. Especially if it gets to the point where I'd shave my head. "  
  
"Don't shave your head for a cult, okay? Your hair is too pretty for that. ”  
  
"Very well. Only because you insisted. " Kirumi took some pride in hearing that, running a hand through her hair. " I do try to take care of it. "  
  
Kaede ran a hand through Kirumi's hair as well, smiling.  
  
“See? It’s nice, isn’t it? I may be in poverty, but I can still afford to take care of my hair. ” She bragged.  
  
Kaede chuckled. "You're so full of it."  
  
"Do shut up." Kirumi let out a snide chuckle in return.  
  
"Ha! Make me! "  
  
"Saying 'just fucking kiss me,' would be easier at this rate."  
  
"Same thing," Kaede rolled her eyes  
  
"Well, how about it?" Kirumi asked, fluttering her eyes at Kaede.  
  
"Clearly we're on the same page," Kaede said before she kissed Kirumi quickly "right?"  
  
Kirumi blushed before promptly returning the kiss. "Hmph. Right. " She trailed off. " At least you get it. "  
  
"I get how gay you are," Kaede teased.  
  
"You're no better. You can hardly contain herself. " Kirumi snapped back.  
  
"You're an enabler. You know I'm being an ass on purpose. "  
  
"You've certainly got the ass to be an ass." Kirumi snickered.  
  
"Just like you to be paying attention to my ass," Kaede taunted with a giggle.  
  
" Don't act as if you dislike it. It's one of your best qualities. Next to your lap of course. If the movie wasn't so suspenseful, I may have fallen asleep. And I can be very cranky when rudely awoken. "  
  
"I never said you being a pervert was a bad thing," Kaede teased.  
  
"So long as you can properly appreciate it. I promise I won't be as gross about it as the others. " She teased back.  
  
"It's a classy kind of perversion, huh? Is that it? " Kaede is holding back her giggles. " Professional perversion. Business casual perversion. "  
  
"Really? Business casual perversion? " She stared blankly at Kaede before letting out a small chuckle. " You should write a book on these. "  
  
"Aww..." Kaede fake pouted. "But I need the insight of a professional pervert to write this book!"  
  
"Now I'm a professional? You know what; I changed my mind. If I become the Ultimate Pervert, kill me off early. "  
  
Kaede burst out laughing. "You're so picky!"  
  
Kirumi also laughed back, a wide smirk spread across her face. “And yet you put up with it!”  
  
"Maybe it's just a little charming. In a fucking agitating kind of way,"  
  
"Bitch, if anything you can handle some mild agitation." Kirumi beamed at Kaede. "So then, what do you wish to do now?"  
  
Kaede shrugged "There isn't really much else to do unless you had something in mind."’  
  
"I'm off for the evening. If you wish we can just l ay here and watch the static. " Kirumi glanced over the television.   
  
"You can stay as long as you want," Kaede said, "Maybe I can find a late rerun of something."  
  
"I shall keep that in mind. Another movie wouldn't be so bad either. I doubt it'll top the first one, though. "  
  
"Do you want to pick the next movie? I don't mind. "  
  
"How about..." Kirumi looked over her phone lazily. "Let's watch Die Hard."  
  
"Alright, I'll set it up" Kaede reluctantly sat up to stream the movie, not so secretly eager to continue cuddling.  
  
Kirumi was not going to admit she wanted to continue to cuddle. Nor that she wanted to leave anytime soon. “Does this one have a twist as well?”  
  
"Not really," Kaede admitted, "but I still think it's violent enough for you to enjoy it."  
  
“Senseless violence is what I live for.” She mused.  
  
"That's what I thought," Kaede chuckled as she started the stream.


	6. 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With Tsumugi's help, Shuichi plans a viewing party to celebrate the recent season finale of Danganronpa. Meanwhile, Korekiyo introduces himself to the chat and Kirumi pays Kaede a visit at work.

Tsumugi: DID YOU ALL SEE THE SEASON FINALE??   
  
Shuichi: YES!!!!!!   
  
Kirumi: I did, yes.   
  
Ouma: i saw it too. ii liked it a lot,,   
  
Tsumugi: We have to hold a viewing party to celebrate!! I promise I ’ll help, I can bring snacks and everything!   
  
Shuichi: that sounds like a great idea! We could rewatch all the best seasons at my place while my parents are working. we need to pick a good date!   
  
Kirumi: Kaede is working, but I guarantee she’ll want to be involved.   
  
Tsumugi: I’m working a lot the next few days...   
  
Kokichi: aany day works fffor mee   
  
Shuichi: I know it does <3   
  
`Korekiyo Shinguji has joined the chat! `   
  
Tsumugi: Little bro!! You finally joined!! Omg, I sent you that invite an hour ago!   
  
Korekiyo: i was busy an hour ago.   
  
Tsumugi: Busy doing what?   
  
Korekiyo: my free time is not ur business.   
  
Tsumugi: Aw, but we’re family…   
  
Korekiyo: me suddenly having a sister doesn’t negate the fact that im allowed to have a private life, u know.   
  
Kaede: you two sound close.   
  
Tsumugi: We are!   
  
Korekiyo: no we are not.   
Korekiyo: what have u guys been talking about?   
  
Shuichi: nothing really, i guess. it's just a group chat i made for my fellow dangan fans   
Shuichi: but you haven't missed much of anything~   
  
Korekiyo: ah danganronpa yeah ive seen a couple eps of that   
  
Shuichi: wait have you ever even finished a season??   
  
Korekiyo: ive seen the ending of a season but never really watched it in full   
  
Shuichi: you... you've watched season finales but not the full season?   
  
Korekiyo: yea. Is something wrong with that? I mean there are so many eps   
  
Shuichi: well yeah but you just...   
Shuichi: i mean   
Shuichi: who watches a finale????? without knowing anything else   
  
Korekiyo: i mean Tsumugi is really into DR so i always watch the finals with her.   
  
Tsumugi: Isn’t Korekiyo a great little brother?? : DDDD   
  
Kirumi: Shuichi, why did you add him?   
  
Shuichi: because Tsu asked me sooo nicely~   
  
Kirumi: Right.   
  
Korekiyo: she wanted to introduce me.   
  
Tsumugi: As much as I’d love to stay and do exactly that, I have to get to work!   
  
Kirumi: Things are always quieter when people are working.   
  
Shuichi: you just miss ur girlfriend (＾q＾)   
  
Shuichi: say speaking of work there was something I wanted to offer you   
  
Kirumi: Don’t even fucking finish that thought.   
  
Shuichi: NOT LIKE THAT. I’ll dm you, just hear me out okay??   
  
Kirumi: I reserve any right to verbally assault you as I please if you send me anything remotely unpleasant.   
  
`Tsumugi Shirogane is now offline. `   
  
Shuichi: Korekiyo will you be coming to the viewing party??   
  
Korekiyo: viewing party?   
  
Shuichi: The Danganronpa viewing party! I’m holding it in a few days since Tsumugi is doing internship things. we’re going to watch the most recent season of Danganronpa!   
  
Kirumi: I’ll tell Kaede about the viewing party.   
  
`Kirumi Tojo is now offline. `   
  
Shuichi: huh?? Kirumi you could just dm herrr,, it’s easier that wayyy   
  
Korekiyo: what internship   
  
Shuichi: ? Tsumugi’s internship with Danganronpa   
  
Korekiyo: tsumugi isn’t an intern. She’s a talent scout.   
  
Kaede sat at the counter in the record store, tapping her fingers off it as she snuck peeks at her phone under the table. The store was made up entirely of two rooms, one being off limits to non-employees. Fortunately for her, Kaede is the only employee. It wasn't the worst job. She did have a stool. It was rare that she everreally had to stand up to help a customer.   
  
The store smells distinctly of wood chips despite not being new at all. The records were all alphabetized and kept on shelves while t-shirts for long extinct and never popular bands hung on the walls. Most of them were local.   
  
Just as Kaede was zoning out for what would have been the millionth time that day, a chiming signaled a customer at the door. Kirumi walked into the shop and looked around curiously.   
  
The scent of wood filled the air as she looked around, her arms folded across her chest. Kirumi was still in her work uniform. Kaede figured she must have been in a rush to make it here.   
  
“I’ve seen better,” Kirumi said aloud to no one in particular before strolling up to the counter. “So," she asked, looking disinterested. “Are you for sale?” A small grin crept onto her face.   
Kaede's expression twitched noticeably at the question. No doubt partially because Kirumi was still in uniform.   
  
"I could be," Kaede replied.   
  
  
Kirumi let out a small chuckle and tapped her nails on the counter a few times, before resting a hand under her chin. “This is it huh? It’s so dreary. Not that I’m one to talk. ”   
  
"Well, it's usually really slow in here, but I'd  say it has gotten  interesting in the past thirty  seconds ,"  Kaede smiled back.   
  
“Did you happen to get a new selection within the last thirty seconds?” She asked. “I kid of course. That was my impression of you being dense. ” Kirumi chuckled.   
  
"Oh, ha ha," Kaede rested her head on one hand, her elbow propped up against the table. She was still smiling slightly.   
  
Kirumi leaned against the counter and looked over her phone, with a roll of her eyes. “So, what’s new?"   
  
"You're new," Kaede answered. "Aside from that, nothing else really."   
  
“Speaking of me and things that are new, I have a surprise.”   
  
“A surprise?” Kaede raised an eyebrow. “Am I allowed to guess what it is?”   
  
“Absolutely not, I know you too well.” Kirumi met her eyes with apparent seriousness. “There’s actually two surprises, but I’m not letting you guess either of them.”   
  
“Well, what is it?”   
  
“I’ll tell you later.”   
  
Kaede pouted a bit before Kirumi gently kissed her cheek in apology. Kaede had to refuse to crack a smile at the affection.   
  
Kirumi chuckled under her breath. “This place isn’t all bad. If you were murdered, it would take them a few days to find the body. Since no one ever comes in.”   
  
"Oh shit, that isn't a threat, is it?" Kaede joked. "Because it's absolutely true. Are you hiding the baseball bat under that skirt or something? "   
  
“I was goingtogo back for it later, if anything.” Kirumi teased. “Even if I won’t need it at my new accommodations.” She rested a hand over Kaede’s. “Did you see who else Saihara added? I cannot stand that guy. ” She let out a groan.   
  
"The one with the long hair and the mask right? Kor... Korek... Him. We aren't exactly close. Is he a dick? "   
  
“Not exactly,” Tojo trailed off. “He’s nice. But he’s too nice. If that makes any sense to you. Like a grow a pair you lanky freak. ”   
  
Kaede laughed. "He just doesn't fit your doom and gloom ways huh."   
  
“Spend five minutes with him and try not to burst a blood vessel.” Kirumi scoffed.   
  
"Damn, that bad, huh? Well at least if he pisses you off in the group chat you can just ignore him. "   
  
“You’ll see soon enough. Apparently he just cannot take a hint. ”   
  
"I'm sure you've dealt with way worse in terms of not taking a hint."   
  
"Oh I have, I have. But that's all behind me now. Thankfully. Even so, that's behind me now. I can imagine the worst you'll have to deal with is the occasional drunk or hipster. " She moved to flip through the records on display.   
  
"Yeah that's usually as bad as it gets. I can count a few notable incidents where the conversation topic ends up being my chest but those people are never here long. Or welcome back. "   
  
"Consider yourself lucky they are shown the door. One would think having a 'regular' would be nice. But it's not. " Kirumi pulled out one record and looked it over. " The season 23rd OST in vinyl? I understand that wasn't the best season, but I have to wonder if it might make a good peace offering. "   
  
Kaede peered over "peace offering? "   
  
" A simple sorry doesn't take back cracked bones and bruises. " She said solemnly. " Or death threats. " She looked over her shoulder. " It's for the boy toy. "   
  
"Oh. I guess a gift is a good start," Kaede replied. She was taken aback by this.   
  
"Or would it offend a super-fan since its from an ill season?" She rubbed her temple. "I'm overthinking this." Kirumi shook her head back and forth and turned to Kaede. "I am certain I could scrounge something together," She dug around in her pockets.   
  
Kaede smiled at the mention of Kirumi demanding her pay "That's an interesting thought. I can only imagine how intimidating your expression would've had to be while you were wearing that outfit. "   
  
“I would’ve been more frightening if it wasn’t for this ridiculous outfit.” She scoffed looking herself over. “This thing is a real bitch to move around in. And everyone on the street is gawking at you like a piece of meat ready to be served. ”   
  
"Ugh. You can change into something at my place if you want. Besides, you're reserved anyways. "   
  
“Am I now? Given my current wealth, I suppose that’s all I can actually afford. ” She sneered. “ But it’s appreciated, nonetheless. ”   
  
"I'm not gonna charge you for borrowing my clothes," Kaede joked as she rung up the purchase.   
  
“I didn’t realize we were at that level of our relationship just yet. But don’t think this means I’ll parade around as a maid. ”   
  
"Aww," Kaede pouted a bit, trying not to laugh. "You want a bag with that or are you good."   
  
“I’ll take a bag. This dress doesn't exactly have pockets or anything,” she said defiantly and looked over her nails. “But take your time with my receipt.”   
Kaede chuckled "Yeah  yeah , here you  go ,"  Kaede took the  record and  put it in a plastic bag before  handing it back to  Kirumi "don't  go swinging that around, these  things shatter. "   
  
“Thank you,” she smiled and took the bag. “Please, I’m not going to hit someone with it. It’s far too frail to do any real damage. ” She scoffed.   
  
" Yeah ,  well , you never know,"  Kaede chuckled.   
  
Kirumi waved it off before, leaning back and gazing towards the backroom. It seemed like whoever was back there was too wrapped up in there own work. Whatever that was. Kirumi hopped up on the counter, sitting on it and crossed her legs. A dark grin spread across her face. "A shame you can't play hooky. This place makes a tomb seem lively. "   
  
“No need,” Kaede replied as she checked her phone. “It’s closing time.” She stepped out from behind the counter and started turning out lights in the store before preparing to lock up.   
  
As Kaede and Kirumi left the record store, Kirumi turned to look at her.   
  
“What?” Kaede asked.   
  
“Just wondering if you’re ready for the surprise.”   
  
“Probably as ready as I’ll ever be.”   
  
  
“Alright,” Kirumi smirked. “ Well, firstly we’re going to a party. Shuichi’s viewing party. ”   
  
“And the other?”   
  
“I quit my job. Surprise. ”


	7. 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kaede attends Shuichi's Danganronpa viewing party, and Tsumugi owns up to the truth of her profession.

Kaede arrived at Shuichi's house after school. In the week prior, a lot had come to pass, from Kirumi quitting her job to the recent season finale of Danganronpa. Kaede didn't feel it was necessary to complain. Especially when her rich classmate had invited his entire server over to eat food and watch TV together.

The house itself was massive and extravagant. It sat separate from most others with an enormous front garden and long driveway. Kaede wondered if every famous actor lived like this. What are the odds that Shuichi would be born the son of two such actors. They must've pooled their earnings to live in a place like this.

Kaede rang at the large front doors and waited. When the doors opened, Kirumi was behind them.

  
"Oh, wow, what a cute maid you are," Kaede teased.

  
Kirumi narrowed her eyes a bitbit smiled slightly. "Shut up and get your ass in here," she said. "You're early, I'm still setting things up."

  
Kirumi led Kaede through a long hallway and past several intricate chambers that Kaede couldn't help but peek into before they arrived in the living room. It was even bigger than the others, with a pool table on one side and the TV at the opposite end. A massive flat screen hung on the wall. Light filtered into the blue tinted room through tall windows. Some were open, and the thin white drapes rocked to and fro with each gentle breeze.

  
“How is it working for the blue pit stain?” Kaede asked as Kirumi finished setting out drinks and snacks for everybody to share.

  
The table Kirumi was tending to sat low before luxurious couches. Kaede couldn’t fathom how much they would’ve cost. On the coffee table were decorated bowls full of assorted chips. Beside them were cans and cans of different soft drinks, perfect for a shared TV marathon.

  
“Aside from the part about having to deal with the aforementioned pit stain, it’s nowhere near as bad as I thought it might be.” Kirumi continued waiting on the empty table as she spoke. Shuichi must have still been online, and the others on their way.

  
“A real shame your old boss didn’t let you keep the maid outfit when you quit,” Kaede commented.

  
“Maybe for you,” Kirumi forced back amusement in an attempt to look threatening. “ It’s easier to work in casual clothes. ”

  
Kirumi’s outfit was definitely casual. She was wearing a thin sweater and leggings in a dark colour that suited her. Kaede wasn’t entirely used to seeing Kirumi without a frilly skirt on anymore. It wasn’t that she minded. Kirumi looked better than ever in something she actually enjoyed wearing.

  
“So you don’t mind then, maido?”

  
“His parents pay well.” Kirumi’s answer was succinct and delivered with a devilish grin.

  
It wasn’t long before Shuichi’s viewing party was underway. Kaede had technically been the first one to show up, as Kirumi was already working at Shuichi’s house. His parents were away at the time, and this made it the perfect opportunity forShuichi to bring his ‘friends’ over. His house was massive, room after room boasting their influence. The main attraction of that day was the lounge and the flatscreen TV inside it.

  
Shuichi’s ‘friends’ all showed up separate from each other, save for Tsumugi and Korekiyo who not only arrived late but arrived together.   
“It’s been a while since I was actually invited to somebody’s house,” an obviously anxious Tenko said as she sat isolated on the couch.

  
“Don’t worry about it,” Shuichi said. “As long as you don’t trash the place! Don’t look so anxious, Tenko, you’re among… Are we friends? ”

  
For several moments, Tenko didn’t confirm or deny this. Instead she sat with her hands folded in her lap and eventually replied with a shrug. "Are we?"

  
“Sure,” Rantaro butted in. “ We can say that. Make it official. We’re friends. ”

  
“Tsumugi takes even longer to prepare than I do, believe it or not,” Korekiyo said as Shuichi led the two of them into the living room. The others were already sitting on the couches and eagerly waiting for them.

  
“I don’t get it,” Tsumugi added. “You spend all that time putting on eyeliner only to wear a mask? Do you put on lipstick too? ”

  
“I don’t like lipstick, Tsumugi,” Korekiyo said as he sat down by Rantaro. Tsumugi sat beside Korekiyo, practically pushing Tenko away from them and further down the couch.   
“Aw, but you’d look so pretty in it!" Tsumugi said. "C’mon, let’s see your handsome smile! ” She draped herself over Korekiyo’s shoulders as if threatening to tickle him or steal his mask. Knowing her, it could have easily been both.

  
“I’d prefer if I didn’t,” Korekiyo replied firmly, shaking her off of him.

  
“Let’s rewatch this season from the beginning!” Shuichi exclaimed. “Everybody is finally here!” He flopped down on the couch next to Kokichi and enveloped him in a massive hug. Kokichi squeaked at the sudden attention before burying himself in Shuichi’s arms.

  
Kaede tugged gently on Kirumi’s arm, pulling her close. “If those who are allowed to cuddle I say it’s fair game, babe,” she giggled. Kirumi responded by opening her arms welcomingly. Kaede settled herself between them.

  
They enjoyed the food and drink Kirumi had set out for them as the entire recent season of Danganronpa replayed for them. The occasional piece of popcorn was thrown at the screen at any character who was particularly agitating. Most of Kaede’s attention wasn’t on the screen, but instead the people around her at the moment.

  
Korekiyo and Rantaro had seemingly struck up a conversation about the show as they watched it. Tsumugi looked annoyed at the fact she was being ignored. Shuichi was making no effort to hide his flirting with a flustered but otherwise high spirited Kokichi. Tenko seemed to actually be watching the show, enjoying the food while she was at it. Kirumi also sat quietly as the series played. Kaede leaned into her, tucking her head under Kirumi’s chin.

  
“I’m going to use the washroom,” Tsumugi said as she stood up. “Nobody take my seat, I’ll be right back!”

  
“It’s down the hall to the left,” Shuichi pointed to the right end of the room where said hallway opened up.

  
Nobody was watching when Tsumugi stopped in the hallway. Except Kaede, who peeked to the side just as Tsumugi was lowering her phone. It had been facing the group still seated around the TV, but there was no sound to indicate that any picture had been taken. Tsumugi then tucked her phone unceremoniously back into her coat as she made her way down the hall. Kaede returned her attention to the screen and then Kirumi. She opted to ignore Tsumugi and settle further in Kirumi's arms with a satisfied hum.

  
Tsumugi returned after the image of her group had been sent in to higher ups. What followed was a blur in Kaede’s mind. Everything sped up as she recalled it. She remembered the confirmation that they’d all been accepted for Danganronpa and the excitement that followed. The preparation. The writing that she wasn’t allowed to see. It was all a big surprise. Tsumugi had wanted it this way all along, keeping everything a secret from her title to her promise that she'd take her friends with her into Danganronpa.

  
Kaede hadn’t expected any of it to be so real.

  
What she knew was real was her recollection of excitement. Of the assumption they’d be famous. Kaede remembered being told that after the show was over, she wouldn’t be interviewed or on TV in any way related to Danganronpa. At the time, Kaede didn’t think much of this. It was how this was always done, after all. It was for the immersion. For the gruesome spectacle of fake blood and fantasy murder.

  
Kaede would gladly give up her previous hopeless life for even a temporary one in the spotlight she’d wished for so badly.   
None of it was supposed to be real, though.

  
Kaede hadn’t expected that the cold pressure of cold iron around her neck would wake her from obliviousness. She hadn’t expected her life to flash before her eyes. She hadn’t expected to remember what she did.

  
So in her last state of wakefulness, Kaede tried to scream for the others to run. To escape Tsumugi. She didn’t have time to tell them everything. Kaede desperately reached out for Kirumi and her heart shattered when it was Shuichi who reached back. It fell to the base of her stomach where dread burned through her. In that moment, Kaede would've willingly died if it meant she could scream at him to get out of the way. She didn't want him to be the last person she'd see.   
Kaede’s coming sob was strangled as she was dragged away, praying for Kirumi to run. Recall what they’d given up to be here. That it was all far too real. As her vision grew foggy Kaede begged it wasn’t real. She begged that they'd escape. She would give up her previous hopeless life if it meant that they would live.   


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for reading The Catalyst! It was a blast to adapt that RP I was in as a story I could share. I'm so glad people enjoyed reading it, because I enjoyed writing it!   
> And for those of you who first discovered me through this fic; I'm sorry, my writing can get pretty damn sad, it's basically my thing!! I hope you enjoyed the experience either way! Love~!


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